


How Things Change

by Spaceykacey



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Brain Damage, Family Feels, Gen, Head Injury, Hurt Kíli, Hurt/Comfort, Mother-Son Relationship, Seizures
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-07
Updated: 2014-12-25
Packaged: 2018-02-24 11:45:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 29,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2580281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spaceykacey/pseuds/Spaceykacey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the incident with the trolls, an accident leaves the company reeling. Kili's life is changed forever, and with it, the lives of those who love him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is just something I've been working on for a while, when I've had time. Just a warning, it strays pretty far from canon, and I have not been terribly kind to Kili in this story. I own nothing.

After the incident with the trolls, Thorin was frustrated. When it came time to send a group to catch their dinner, he did not trust his nephews to go as a pair.

"Fili and Gloin will hunt tonight. Kili, you will watch the ponies with Ori and Bofur, because clearly two dwarves are not sufficient for pony duty," Thorin ordered.

Fili knew that arguing was futile, but Kili had yet to learn that lesson, though he'd been taught it countless times growing up. He opened his mouth to speak, but before words came out Fili threw a stick at his brother. This distracted him for a moment, but he attempted to argue again. This time, Bofur gently, shoved Kili off the log he was perched on.

"Sorry, lad! I guess I tripped!" he said cheerfully. With one final look from his brother, Kili got the point. He sat up, but pouted on the forest floor until Fili and Gloin took their leave.

"Alright, boys, let's get the ponies their dinner while Fili and Gloin catch ours," Bofur said. Kili stood up and followed Ori and Bofur. He ran to catch up with Bofur and grabbed his hat.

"I'm afraid Myrtle is cold!" Kili said, sprinting to the horses. He put the hat on Myrtle's head. Bofur snatched his hat, brushed it off, and shoved it back on his own head. They led the horses to the nearby stream so they could eat the grass and drink the cool water.

Ori sat on a log. He glanced at the pony he'd been riding, Daisy. He noticed that there was blood dripping down Daisy's rear leg. "Daisy's hurt. Look, she's bleeding!" he called to the others.

The three dwarves knelt down to look at her leg. There was a tear in the flesh. Bofur went in search of a cloth to clean the leg and Ori sat on a rock to document it in his leather book, as he was the company scribe.

Kili continued to inspect the wound. From the woods rose a loud howl. The horses spooked and chaos erupted. In this commotion, one of the ponies reared up and kicked Kili in the side of the head. When the dust cleared, he was laying prone on the ground, awake, but not moving.

Bofur was at his side immediately. "Kili! Are you alright?" Bofur asked. It was then that he saw the blood dripping into the dirt from right above Kili's ear. "Actually, don't answer that," Bofur amended. Kili had yet to acknowledge his presence, his eyes roving and not settling on anything. And he was shaking like a leaf. Bofur knew this was much more serious than a bump on the head and ordered Ori to fetch help. Ori scampered off.

Bofur used the cloth he'd gotten for Daisy and pressed it against Kili's head, very gently. Kili winced, but did not move. Bofur was no stranger to head wounds. His cousin had received an axe in his head many years back, and has not been the same since; prone to staring spells and times of very high emotion. "Kili, can you hear me?" No response. Bofur got right in Kili's face and tried to catch his focus. Kili's eyes met his briefly and then rolled around again. "You're going to be fine! You're just stunned is all," Bofur said cheerfully, putting on a brave face for the dwarfling.

Pretty soon, heavy footsteps were heard. Thorin, Dwalin, and Oin entered the clearing. Their faces were solemn and concerned. There was a touch of panic on Thorin's face. Thorin knelt next to his nephew. "Kili, look at me," he ordered, sternly. Kili did not comply. He didn't even seem to have heard him.

Thorin sighed and moved to hover over Kili's face. He noticed grimly that Kili seemed to see nothing. It was as though he was looking right through him. "Has he moved, Bofur?" Or shown any sign of awareness?" Bofur shook his head. Thorin gave Oin a look that said 'what do we do?'.

"We can check for paralaysis in his extremities. If he has feeling still, we can safely move him back to the camp," he said. "I don't want to move him until we've determined if there is damage to his neck or back."

Oin reached for Kili's left hand. It was motionless and limp. Oin pressed his fingernail into the base of Kili's fingernail. They all breathed a sigh of relief when Kili grimaced and tried to pull away weakly. When Oin repeated the process on his right hand, he did the same, but seemed to pull away with more strength, and he turned his head. When Oin poked Kili's feet with a small pin, he attempted to pull his legs away from the pain.

"Let's get him back to camp," Oin said. Dwalin scooped Kili up into his arms.

"He's limp as a ragdoll," Dwalin commented. Luckily, it was Dwalin carrying him, because his armspan was long enough to support his head and neck as well has his legs fairly comfortably.

When they reached the camp, the remaining dwarves gasped when they saw the limp burden in Dwalin's arms.

"Bifur and Bombur will gather the ponies," Thorin said. He unrolled Kili's bedroll near the fire and Dwalin set his burden down gently.

"He's drooling something fierce," Dwalin said, gesturing to the wet spot on his arm. Indeed, Kili seemed to have lost the ability to swallow. Thorin gently wiped the saliva from Kili's face.

"Thorin, you'll need to sit behind him so we can prop him upright against you. At this rate, he'll choke on his own spit." Thorin nodded and sat against a log. Dwalin lifted Kili again gently and nestled him against his uncle's chest.

Oin knelt down stiffly to examine Kili's head. The hoof had broken the skin in several places, and there was already an alarming amount of swelling behind and above Kili's right ear. In addition to the blood coming from the wound, there was also a trickle of blood coming from inside his ear. There was deep bruising forming under Kili's right eye as well.

During the inspection, Kili would glance at Oin and grimace when he prodded somewhere particularly sensitive. The glances were brief. The rest of the time, Kili's eyes roved above Oin's head. He had yet to make a sound; not even a moan. Thorin carefully wiped his nephew's mouth every so often.

"It would seem that his skull is fractured. The bone is damaged just above his ear," Oin stated. Thorin felt himself blanch and his limbs felt heavy.

"What does that mean?" he asked.

"We can only wai—," Oin didn't get to finish because Kili's body went rigid and his head snapped to the left. His eyes shot to the left, and he was gasping. Oin closed his eyes, sorrowful. The dwarfling's back was arched and his legs and arms were completely rigid and moved rhythmically. The fit lasted less than a minute. No one spoke.

Bofur broke the silence. "Bifur had fits like that after his head wound. He turned out alright." Thorin frowned. Bifur may be alive, but he was, for all intents and purposes, deranged.

Kili's eyes were drooping now and he looked exhausted.

"No, you can't sleep yet, lad," Oin said. "Has he made any noises since the accident?" The others shook their heads. Oin pursed his lips. He stood and moved behind Thorin and Kili and snapped his fingers together near Kili's ears, several times on both sides. No reaction. He opened his mouth to speak when there was a crash behind him.

Bofur had been rifling through Bombur's pack, looking for a tin cup, when the pack fell from the rock. Kili flinched and grimaced, turning his head slightly.

"At least we know he's hearing us," Dwalin said.

They all fell silent. Oin began pulling Kili's hair away from the wound. "Bofur, would you boil some water?" he asked. "I'm having trouble getting at the wound to clean it. It may be necessary to cut his hair right around the wounds," he said, looking at Thorin for approval. Cutting a dwarf's hair was not something done but in the most dire of circumstances. Thorin nodded stiffly, his eyes not moving from the spot in the ground he'd been staring at for several minutes.

Oin took a sharp knife from his pack and began carefully cutting away the hair closest to the wounds. Kili tried to turn his head, as the pulling of the hair was causing him discomfort. He tried again to escape the discomfort by turning head more rapidly back and forth. Without warning, he was sick all down his front and on Thorin's supporting arm.

Once Kili was finished, Thorin placed a hand on the side of Kili's face, both to comfort him and hold him still while Oin worked. Eventually, the hair was cut away quite close to the skin. The water had boiled and Bofur set the hot pot down near Oin, who dipped a cloth into it and began cleaning the wounds. Kili struggled very weakly. He began to moan, which was the first noise he'd made. Oin worked quickly, and deemed that stitches would do no good, and that they would just cover the wounds and keep them clean.

Kili had tears streaming down his face. Thorin wished he could offer more comfort, but was frozen with the gravity of the situation. They sat in silence for a while, and Kili fell asleep, much to the horror of the group. They could only pray that he would wake again.

In the span of an hour, so many things had changed. What would they tell Fili? This would devastate him on a level the other dwarves couldn't imagine. For now, though, all they could do was wait.


	2. Chapter 2

They sat in silence for over an hour. All of the dwarves were unsure of what to do, so they followed their kings lead and stayed silent. Balin had come to join Bofur sitting near the fire. Thorin held his nephew, and the other dwarves could see the wheels turning in his mind. No doubt he was thinking about how this tragedy would affect his kin. Fili would find out soon enough, but Dis was so far away. Thorin did not know if Kili would survive long enough for her to say her goodbyes. In fact, it was very doubtful he would. He hoped he would survive long enough for Fili to see him one last time.

He was snapped out of his ruminations by the sound of footsteps nearing camp. "Dwalin, take Kili. I must speak to Fili," Thorin said. Dwalin moved to take Thorin's spot and Thorin stood and ran to where the voices were coming from.

The shifting of positions had woken Kili, to Dwalin and Oin's great relief and shock. He seemed a bit more aware, and he looked around in confusion. "We've got ya, lad. Thorin went to get your brother. He went to fetch Fili," Dwalin said in a gentler tone than the other dwarves thought possible.

Thorin found Fili and Gloin trudging through the woods, each with a deer over their shoulders. "We will be eating well for a while!" Fili called to his uncle, happily. As they got a little closer, Fili noticed that something was not right. His uncle looked wrong. Something had happened. "What happened?" he demanded, dropping the deer carcass.

"There's been an accident," Thorin began. Fili started to run past him, but Thorin grabbed him around the waist. "Wait, Fili. I want you to be prepared." This made Fili fight to get past him all the more. They ended up sprawled on the forest floor, Thorin pinning him down. "LISTEN, Fili. Kili is alive. He was kicked by a startled pony. His skull is fractured, and he has not seemed much like himself since the accident. Oin has done all he could, but now we can only wait."

Fili couldn't breathe. He felt like the world stopped. "What?" he asked, though he'd heard every word. He shoved Thorin roughly away from him and sprinted to the campsite, unsure of what he would find when he got there.

The fire came into view, and near it he could see Kili in Dwalin's arms. That sight alone made his heart stop. He did not stop running until he was several feet from Kili. He couldn't see his face. He dropped to his knees suddenly, afraid to reach his brother. Afraid of the finality of seeing him.

Balin stood and helped Fili to stand. "He's awake," he said. "I think it will do him good to see you." Fili nodded dumbly. Balin took his hand as though he was a dwarfling again, and Fili let him lead him to his brother.

The second Fili came into view, Kili changed. His eyes lit up and his mouth opened, and his face finally showed an emotion other than pain and confusion. He shifted suddenly, his feet kicking in the dirt, startling Dwalin, who feared he was having another convulsion.

Fili knelt in front of his brother, smiling broadly. Tears were streaming down his face as he took in his brother's appearance. He gently touched the bandage and his hand stopped when he noticed that his brother's hair had been cut. "Hi, brother. What did you get yourself into this time," he asked, stroking his face. "Mum'll not be happy when she finds out you got yourself injur-." He was cut short when Kili's body arched away from Dwalin and went rigid. He made gasping noises and his arms and legs jerked wildly. Fili didn't know what to do. Balin put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. After less than a minute, Kili fell still.

Dwalin whispered soothingly in Kili's ear, before looking to Fili. "I'll take him," Fili said, scooting to take Dwalin's place supporting Kili's limp form. Dwalin nodded and they carefully shifted Kili into his brother's waiting arms.

Kili relaxed immediately into Fili's arms. Thorin and Gloin had just arrived, dragging both the deer behind them. Any other night, there would be much celebration over two kills, but tonight was different. Ori, Dori, and Nori had all but disappeared, wanting to give as much space as possible to both Kili and those tending to him. Bombur and Bifur had returned, having taken care of the horses. Bombur was quietly prepping dinner, and Bifur was sitting against a tree alone, as he often did.

Every so often, Kili would tense, but then relax again. Thorin dropped the deer and went to join his nephews. The rest of the dwarves all busied themselves with dinner, and any number of random tasks.

Thorin sat with the boys, neither nor Fili speaking for some time. There really were no words worth saying. After several moments, Kili's breathing changed, and his head was turning from side to side. He was weakly digging his feet in the dirt. Thorin tried to catch his eyes, but to no avail. His face no longer bore the peaceful expression he'd had since Fili's arrival. Fili laid him down, head on his bedroll and hovered over Kili's face. Once his eyes finally settled on his brother, he relaxed almost immediately.

"You're alright, brother. What happened there? Did you forget who was holding you? I'm right here; I wont leave you," Fili said softly, stroking his brother's hair, mindful of the wounds. There was a shimmer of a smile on Kili's face, and Thorin noticed that he was no longer drooling. This caused Thorin to trust a hope that Kili would recover. He watched Fili soothe his brother, and was filled with a sense of pride in Fili. Within the span of moments, Fili has completely switched roles; from a fighter to a caretaker. From young and fierce to mature and unbelievably gentle.

Oin had made his way back to his patient when he saw what had transpired. "He seems to be swallowing easier," Thorin said, looking hopefully at Oin, hoping he would bolster his hopes. Oin nodded.

"I believe we can trust him to lie flat now. And I think we will try some broth, when it is finished," Oin said. Fili nodded, not looking away from his brother's face.

"Did you hear that, Kili? I'd bet you're starving by now! It's a safe bet, though, because you're always hungry," he said. "You pretty much ate mum out of house and home growing up. She let you have whatever you wanted though, because you were just so tiny!"

Kili's mouth twitched slightly, and he shifted slightly. Thorin was relieved beyond words to see such recognition in Kili's eyes, and he seemed to understand what his brother was saying. It worried him that he had not spoken yet. He pushed that thought from his mind, though.

"I seem to remember two dwarflings who snuck food from the kitchen, stashing sweets under your pillows," Thorin said, chuckling. His heart swelled when Kili shifted his gaze towards him. His eyes searched until Thorin moved more directly in his line of sight. When his eyes settled on Thorin, his eyebrows shot up and his mouth twitched up in the corners again. Suddenly, however, Kili twitched violently. Thorin noticed that this time, rather than his whole body going rigid, it was just his left side that contracted.

This fit was very short, but when it stopped, all the clarity that had just been there was gone. Kili's eyes roved, moving aimlessly. Bofur was standing nearby with a steaming bowl of broth, not sure when to intrude on the moment. When Thorin looked towards him, he walked over and handed him the bowl and spoon.

When Thorin looked back at his nephews, Fili was talking into Kili's ear. Kili had a look of confusion on his face, but he at least he was mentally present once again. "Set him up against your chest, Fili. I'll feed him," Thorin said. At hearing this, Kili grimaced deeply and shook his head slightly.

Fili maneuvered his brother so he was propped up against his chest, and Thorin knelt in front of him. Kili was now scowling, his eyebrows knit together. "I know you're not happy about this, but we've got to get some food in you, somehow. Until you can do this yourself, you'll have to put up with our help," Fili said, knowing that being spoon-fed would indeed make Kili very uncomfortable.

Thorin brought the spoon to his lips, and Kili resisted briefly, but gave in. The first spoonful seemed to surprise him, and most of it dribbled down his chin, causing to scowl even more. After a few more bites, they were more successful. After several minutes, Kili pursed his lips and refused to open them for more. He hadn't eaten as much as Thorin would have liked, but at least it was something.

Kili looked exhausted, and his eyelids were seeming very heavy. Fili laid him back down. He and Thorin began preparing him for a night's sleep. They removed his outer layers carefully and pulled off his boots. His weapons had already been set aside. Fili pulled his blanket up over Kili's shoulders. Kili had already fallen asleep.

Thorin had fetched Fili's bedroll and started laying it out right next to Kili's. "Thank you, uncle," Fili said, in a quite, low voice. He looked around at the rest of the company. They had gathered a ways off around another fire they had built, and were eating and talking quietly. It was then that Fili noticed that Gandalf was nowhere to be seen. "Where is Gandalf?" he asked.

"He's wandered off, again. I do not know where he has gone, but I certainly hope he returns. He may be able to help your brother, but his absence makes that possibility unlikely." There was a hint of anger in his voice. Gandalf tended to go missing during vital times.

Fili just nodded, looking back at Kili. Fili then began setting aside his weapons and pulling off his own boots. He crawled into his bedroll and shimmied closer to Kili. They two boys lay facing each other, Fili's head mere inches from his brother's.

Thorin stood and walked away abruptly. He walked a ways off, out of sight of the others, and fell to his knees. Seeing his nephews laying there had awoken something in him. A fear that he hadn't given himself a chance to think on for some time now. If this quest claimed one or both of their lives, he didn't know if he would recover. This fear had been present at the very beginning, when they asked join him on his quest, but as they travelled together, he began to feel as though nothing would go wrong, that fate was finally smiling on them.

So much had changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kili has a very long road ahead of him. So stay tuned!


	3. Chapter 3

Oin had instructed Fili to wake Kili every hour or so, to monitor his condition, and Dwalin, who was first on watch, offered to ensure Fili was woken up to do so. So, the evening routine of everybody spreading out their bedrolls and laying out their weapons began. One by one, all but Dwalin fell asleep. Even Fili was snoring lightly, which surprised Dwalin.

The next morning, breakfast was being prepared by the time Fili woke up. As he'd done so many times throughout the night, he scooted closer to his brother and grabbed his hand. He squeezed his hand and said his name quietly.

Kili grimaced, but opened his eyes. Fili smiled at him. "Good morning, brother," he said softly. Kili squirmed, seeming discontent. "You're alright," Fili said, trying to reassure him. "Do you want to sit up?" He watched Kili's face for an indication of an answer. Kili's eyebrows shot up and he nodded very slightly. Even without words, Kili was quite good at making his opinions known.

Fili scooted over and started to pick Kili's shoulders off the ground, but Kili suddenly lurched to the left in another convulsion. He hadn't had one all night, and Fili had hoped they were out of his system. This one was worse than the previous ones. His whole body was rigid and jerking, and his lips even started turning blue. There was drool escaping Kili's mouth as he writhed. After several minutes, Kili let out a weak and pitiful keen as his body relaxed.

"Shhh. Oh, Kili. I'm so sorry. I've got you," Fili whispered, holding Kili's shoulders and head. Thorin's ears immediately picked up on the keen and he dropped what he'd been doing to run to him.

Fili was cradling his brother, who was breathing heavily and blinking slowly. Thorin knelt next to them and looked at Kili, smiling gently. "Good morning, Kili," he said. Then, looking at Fili, "Bombur made porridge. Let's try to get him to eat some. He'll need his strength today. We must continue on."

Fili was unsure. There were so many questions running through his mind. How would Kili travel if he couldn't even hold up his own head? What if they are attacked? How will Kili defend himself? And to what end? Would they carry Kili all the way to the mountain? Would Thorin find a place to leave him so the quest is not delayed?

He was snapped out of his ruminations by Bilbo, who had all but disappeared since Kili was brought to camp. The hobbit had a steaming bowl of what Fili assumed to be the porridge.

Bilbo looked uncomfortable. Normally, Kili would lighten the mood and relieve the tension. "Thank you, Bilbo," he said. Thorin had left to talk to Oin, and Bilbo sat where he had sat. Kili, who was now sitting up higher against Fili, looked at the hobbit.

"Hello, Kili," Bilbo said stiffly. Kili raised his eyebrows and his mouth curved into a small smile. Bilbo handed the bowl to Fili, who set it on his thigh. After he'd given Fili the bowl, he said something about having to gather his items, mostly to himself. Fili was bothered that Bilbo seemed bothered. He supposed he'd have to get used to his brother being treated so differently for a while. He took the spoon to Kili's mouth. Again, Kili resisted at first, pursing his lips.

"You've got to eat, Kee." Kili obeyed, glaring at no one in particular. "I know you're pouting, brother," Fili said, chuckling. This caused Kili to smile and try to look at his brother. Fili managed to get Kili to eat a few more bites before Thorin and Oin joined them.

"Will he eat any more?" Oin asked, looking at the still mostly full bowl.

"I don't know. Maybe try asking him yourself. He's not an idiot," Fili said, immediately regretting the harshness of his words when he saw Thorin shake his head. "I'm sorry. But he is capable of answering," Fili said in a much more controlled tone of voice.

Oin nodded. "I understand. Kili, will you eat some more? You'll need your strength, lad." Kili shook his head lightly, wincing at the ever-present pain in his head. Oin knelt down and looked into Kili's face. "Headache? Of course you've got a headache. I feel comfortable giving you something for the pain now that you're so alert."

Oin went to fetch a vial out of his satchel and returned to Kili. "I warn you, it is bitter," he said, handing Fili the medicine. Fili brought the vial to Kili's lips and tipped it so Kili could drink it. He struggled to swallow it and made a face of disgust. "I did warn you," Oin said, chuckling at the face Kili had pulled. Whether it was a great warrior or small dwarfling, that particular medicine always elicited the same look.

Kili began to feel the effects immediately, and his eyelids began drooping. "Let's get him ready for travel. The litter will be done soon, and Gandalf says we must leave this place.

"When did Gandalf arrive?" Fili asked, looking around.

"Just before we came over here. He has another wizard with him. They are discussing something that seems to be of some urgency, but they will not say what," Thorin answered. Oin had removed the bandage from Kili's head and was checking the wounds. When he found no issues, he rebandaged them. Kili seemed very out of it while this happened. The medicine was definitely working.

"To ensure that he doesn't injure his head again, I'd like for us to wrap his head in several layers of cloth. Something to cushion it," Oin said. He started to cover his head with some spare cloth that he'd brought over. Before he could finish, Kili flew sideways caught up in another fit. Fili was caught off guard and he barely kept Kili from falling out of his grasp. When Kili relaxed again, Thorin helped resituate him in Fili's arms.

Without speaking, Oin continued working on getting Kili's head wrapped. Bofur had joined them. He took off his hat and placed it carefully on Kili's wrapped head. "One more layer of protection wont hurt," he said, smiling.

Thorin glanced up to Fili, who had been silent for a while. He felt his heart breaking when he saw unshed tears building up in his eyes.

"Fili, I want you to take a walk with me," he said. "You're brother is resting and will be fine with Oin for a few minutes." The way Thorin said the words took the wind out of any of Fili's arguments. He nodded and slowly laid Kili down on his bedroll.

Fili followed his uncle away from the camp. Before Thorin even had a chance to say anything, Fili dropped to the ground, sobbing. "Oh, lad. It's alright," Thorin said, kneeling beside his eldest nephew, wrapping him in a comforting embrace.

"But it's NOT alright! IS IT? Nothing is the same. Everything is different," Fili ranted, his voice loud and tight. "What's the plan, anyways? What of the quest? Are we to carry Kili all the way to the lonely mountain? Are you just going to leave him at the first possible place so he doesn't delay the quest? I just don't understand," Fili said, weeping.

"I know," Thorin said softly. "I don't understand either. And to be honest, I don't know what to do. What would you have me do? I was hoping Gandalf would be of some assistance, but he has made it clear that this is beyond his skill to heal. The only thing to do is continue on, praying to Aule that Kili recovers," Thorin answered. Fili was about to respond when they heard someone shouting their names.

Reaching the camp, he saw Bofur trying to comfort a wailing Kili. Fili skidded to a halt and knelt above Kili. He carefully gathered him into his arms, wiping the tears from his brother's face. Kili was quiet now, but still was very distraught. "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I left you. I told you I'd never leave you. I was just talking to uncle," Fili said soothingly. Fili held his brother, tuning out the bustling campsite as the dwarves made final preparations.

Thorin and Dwalin brought the completed litter over to the boys. Fili and Thorin carefully wrapped Kili in his blanket and lifted him onto the litter. Just as they were getting him settled, a howl rose in the distance.

"Was that a wolf? Are there wolves out here?" Bilbo asked.

"Wolves, no. That is not a wolf," Bofur answered.

"Warg scouts! Which means an orc pack is not far behind," Thorin said. Just then, a warg appeared, quickly killed by Dwalin. The other wizard said something about drawing them off, speeding away on his rabbit drawn sleigh. Thorin and Fili each took an end of Kili's litter and they lifted him.

Kili looked terrified, though Fili didn't know if the fear was due to the impending attack or at being suspended in the air on the litter. He didn't have time to comfort his brother, because the company was taking off at a very quick pace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will hopefully be able to get a chapter up each day. I already have quite a bit written out. Hope you enjoyed the first 3!


	4. Chapter 4

They ran. Kili moaned. Fili wanted so badly to stop and comfort him, to tell him he was safe, but that wasn't possible. They were running for their lives. Radagast's, as they learned was the strange little wizard's name, distraction didn't last long. The orcs were searching for dwarf scent.

The wargs and their riders were catching up to the company, who had no hope of continuing to outrun their pursuers. Carrying Kili decreased their speed greatly. Gandalf had been using magic to thin the pack, managing to dispatch nearly half of them with various incantations.

Struggling with holding up his half of the litter and glancing back to find Fili likewise struggling, Thorin made a decision. "We stand and fight!" he called. Kili was laid on the ground and the dwarves formed a protective circle around him, standing battle ready.

Before any of the company had to swing their weapons, they heard a horn, followed by galloping. Within seconds, they were surrounded by elves on horses. The elves quickly killed the remaining orcs. The dwarves did not lower their weapons. Gandalf said something in Elvish to the riders, and one of the elves dismounted and embraced Gandalf.

The dwarves tightened ranks when the elf approached them. "I think it would be appreciated if you were to lower your weapons," Gandalf said. All of the members of the company looked to Thorin for guidance, waiting to see what he did.

"You are in no danger from us, I assure you," The elf said, removing his helmet. "I am Elrond, Lord of Rivendell."

Thorin hesitated. Behind him, he heard Fili talking to Kili, comforting him. He turned to see Kili in the throes of yet another convulsion, Fili leaning to talk directly into Kili's ear. The elf, Elrond, also saw what was happening with Kili, and his brow furrowed. "Would you allow me to do what I can to help him?" he asked, looking to Thorin for approval.

Thorin took a step between his nephew and the elf. "You will not touch him," Thorin said gruffly. Elrond was taken aback, but did not argue.

Gandalf rolled his eyes. "Thorin Oakenshield. You are being foolish. While Kili's injury is out of my depth, there is a chance the elves may be able to help him. You would be wise to accept that help. You're petulance could cost your nephew dearly." The dwarves shifted uncomfortably at hearing the wizard speak so harshly to their king.

Thorin lowered his weapon and backed off, going to kneel beside his nephews. He nodded slightly to Elrond who quickly went to Kili. Kili was still convulsing. Fili was panicking, because Kili's lips were turning blue again. Elrond placed a hand on Kili's forehead and whispered something in a language Fili and Thorin didn't understand. Almost immediately, Kili stilled and blinked dazedly at the elf in front of him.

After a few seconds, Kili grew concerned, as though he'd just realized where he was. He grimaced and sought out his brother's gaze. His eyes were full of confusion and fear. "I've got you," Fili soothed. "You're safe. That was a bad one, wasn't it, little brother?" Kili just closed his eyes, tears trailing down his cheeks.

Thorin had seen enough of Kili suffering. He would swallow his pride and accept the elves' help. "Let's go. We will take him to Rivendell," he said, standing up and bending to pick up his end of the litter. Fili was shocked, but relieved, and he began to feel hopeful. He and Thorin lifted Kili, who whined. He did not seem to enjoy being carried in such a fashion.

"Just a little longer, Kili," Fili said, turning to look at his brother from his position at Kili's feet.

All of the elves except for Elrond rode ahead of the company. Thankfully, the rest of the walk to the Hidden Valley was relatively uneventful. Elrond and Gandalf spoke in hushed tones at the back of the company.

When they arrived in Rivendell, Thorin grew uncomfortable. "Follow me," Elrond said. "We will take him straight to the healers." Thorin did not argue, much to Gandalf's surprise and relief. "The rest of you may make yourselves comfortable. Lindir will show you to your quarters." Lindir had just come out to see what all the fuss was about when he heard this. He looked incredulously at Elrond, but nodded and led most of the company away.

Thorin, Fili, and Oin followed Elrond across small bridges and through open courtyards until they reached a partially open room with several small beds. In the room there was a strong and pleasant smell of healing herbs.

Carefully, Kili was laid on one of the beds. He still had a look of fear in his eyes, and he was shaking his head back and forth, biting his lip. Fili leaned down to whisper reassurances to Kili once again, placing a hand on his chest.

Elrond walked to the bed. "What is you're name, penneth," he asked.

"His name is Kili. And what does penneth mean?" Fili asked somewhat suspiciously, afraid the elf had insulted his brother.

"Penneth means 'little one or young one' in my language," he answered. He returned his attention to Kili. "Welcome to Rivendell, Master Kili." Elrond then looked to the dwarves. "Can you tell me what happened? How is he injured?"

Thorin and Fili looked to Oin, expecting him to answer. Oin looked at them blankly, pointing to his ear. Thorin repeated the question louder, making Kili flinch.

"He was kicked by a pony. His skull is fractured above his right ear, where the pony's hoof broke the skin. Since then, he has been barely aware of his surroundings, with only small moments of clarity. He has also suffered many convulsions such as the one you witnessed," Oin said. Fili closed his eyes. When it was all said out loud, it made him sick.

Elrond nodded, gently pulling off Bofur's hat that had been lent to the young dwarf. Kili did not like this one bit. He tried to get away, turning his head weakly back and forth.

"Hold still, brother. He is going to help you. You're safe!" Fili said. Upon hearing his brother's voice, he relaxed a bit. Elrond continued to remove layers from Kili's head. After the last layer was discarded, Elrond went to wash his hands in a basin.

He carefully prodded the wounds. Kili let out a breathy whine, turning his head in an attempt to deny Elrond access to his wounds. "I'm sorry, tithen pen. I'm almost done," he said. With his other hand he gently held Kili's head still so he could continue the examination. His thin fingers felt along the swelling above and behind Kili's ear for damage underneath. This caused Kili to whine louder, tears streaming from his eyes.

Fili had to use all the self control he had not to shove the elf away from his brother. Thankfully, Elrond soon finished his examination. He stood and walked to a cabinet to fetch some ointment and clean bandages.

While Elrond was gathering supplies, Kili was jolted in another convulsion, his left side going rigid. Kili's body relaxed again before Elrond could make it back to his side.

Fili wiped drool from Kili's face and tried to catch his eyes but couldn't get Kili to look at him. Fili moved to give Elrond room to help his brother.

Elrond now bent to look at Kili's face. He noticed the way his eyes roved aimlessly. "Can you look at me?" he asked. Kili did not comply. He just continued to look around the room with out an ounce of awareness in his eyes. When he realized he wasn't going to get a response, he went to work applying an ointment to Kili's wounds. When the cool ointment made contact with his skin, Kili grimaced deeply and exhaled shakily but did not turn his head as he'd done earlier to get away from the pain.

Elrond placed a lose bandage over the wounds and helped him drink some healing tea, after Oin inspected it. After drinking the tea, Kili fell asleep. Elrond

sat in a chair near Kili's bed. The dwarves looked expectantly at him. Thorin, who had been silent since they started, finally spoke up. "So? What can you do?" he asked gruffly. He had not wanted to distract the elf from any help he could offer to his nephew, so he bit his tongue throughout the whole process.

"I do not know yet. Head wounds are very difficult, as I'm sure you know. It is impossible to say whether or not Kili will recover. I will do all I can, however, to ensure he receives the best possible treatment. For now, you should rest. You seem weary from your travels and from worry for young Kili. You may use these empty beds. I will return later this evening to see to Kili." With that he took his leave, leaving Fili, Thorin, and Oin in silence.

Oin went to find the rest of the company, and Fili and Thorin stayed rooted to their spots. Neither knew what to say to the other, so they just stayed silent.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the kudos and for the comments! Please let me know what you think of this chapter :)

"You should go check in on the rest. I will stay here," Fili said. "Who knows what havoc they have already wrought on the elves."

Thorin chuckled. "Please send a pointy-eared messenger if something changes," he said, giving Fili a reassuring pat on the back and exited the room.

Fili continued his vigil for a while longer. Soon, he began to feel very sleepy. The combination of the peaceful quiet, the sweet smell of herbs, and the hope that his brother would finally get help were putting him to sleep. He gently scooted Kili so there was room for him to join him on the bed. Kili shifted, his eyelids fluttering. Fili soothed him back further asleep and crawled up onto the bed. He curled up and put an arm over his brother's chest just in case he managed to roll off the bed, which he felt was unlikely. At least that was what he thought.

Fili woke suddenly when there was an abrupt movement to his left. To his horror, Kili was no longer on the bed. He had gone into another convulsion which caused him to fall off the bed. Kili screamed. Fili scrambled off the bed and ran around to Kili's side.

Elrond had just entered the room when he heard the scream. He rushed to Kili's side as well. Kili was laying face down, still bawling. Elrond carefully rolled Kili so he was face up and lying in Fili's lap.

"Shhhh. You're okay. I've got you," Fili soothed, his eyes wide in panic. Elrond went about trying to figure out if Kili was injured from the fall, but it was no easy task. The young dwarf was still bawling, and Elrond had no way of asking the dwarfling where he hurt.

Elrond ran through what injuries could result from a fall out of bed. He decided to check the dwarf's arms for injuries. He started at his shoulders, gently feeling for any possible damage. He did not have to look further than Kili's left shoulder. He could feel where the bones in the shoulder had separated, and Kili's wailing increased as he touched the painful shoulder. He must have injured it by landing awkwardly.

Fili watched the elf and tried to comfort his brother. Apart from the pain, Fili could also see terror in Kili's eyes.

"His shoulder is damaged. Let's get him onto the bed so I can further examine it," he said.

Elrond lifted Kili up and onto the bed. The youngest had stopped screaming, much to Fili's relief and concern. He now whined airily and moaned, unable to escape the pain.

"What in Durin's name happened?" Thorin asked, having just entered.

Fili looked guilty, but he answered nonetheless. "Kili fell off the bed when he had another fit. He hurt his shoulder. I shouldn't have fallen asleep," he said. Thorin didn't acknowledge his nephew's guilt, and instead walked up to Kili's bed.

Elrond stepped up to the bed and gently reached for Kili's arm, but before he started working on the shoulder, he gave the young dwarfling a hopefully reassuring smile, putting a hand on his chest. "I will be gentle, penneth," he said. The elf then started to manipulate Kili's shoulder. The exhausted young dwarf found the energy to begin screaming again, making Fili want to curl up and die. All he could do was stroke Kili's face, trying to offer comfort.

Thorin was basically growling. "Can't you speed this up?" he asked.

"I assure I am working as quickly and carefully as possible. I am unable to give him anything more for the pain, and for that I am sorry." Thorin grunted but said no more. Elrond continued his examination.

"Thankfully, the shoulder is not dislocated. It has just been slightly separated. Ensuring that he rest is all we can do for him, but I will bind the arm to his body so he does not injure it further."

Fili sighed in relief. He wasn't sure he could handle watching his brother have his shoulder put back.

Elrond asked Fili to hold Kili's arm in place while he retrieved something to bind his arm. Kili had stopped crying out, but his face was screwed up in pain and tears were rolling down his cheeks. When the elf returned, he carefully bound Kili's arm.

"Father! What is going on? There are dwarves bathing in the fountain," an elf maiden said. She had entered silently, and took Thorin and Fili by surprise. "Oh, I didn't realize you were working," she said, smiling shyly and starting to leave.

"Arwen, this is Thorin Oakenshield and his nephews Fili and Kili. Fili, Thorin, this is my daughter Arwen," Elrond said. "I could actually use your help."

Arwen inclined her head in greeting to the two conscious dwarves. "What do you need, father?"

"The young Kili has suffered frequent seizures since a head injury. Earlier this evening, he injured his shoulder by falling from the bed during one of those seizures. I think if we make some alterations to the bed, he will be able to sleep more securely," Elrond said, walking to one of the other beds in the room.

He pushed it so it was up against a wall lengthwise. "Arwen, will you bring me a blanket?" Arwen took a thick blanket from an intricately carved cabinet and handed it to her father.

Elrond rolled up the blanket and tucked the thick roll under the sheets along the edge of the bed. He repeated this process with two more blankets, stacking them with the other. When he'd finished, there was a ledge that was intended to keep Kili from rolling off the bed. He did not seem satisfied, however.

"Arwen, please fetch Gellamon. Tell him to bring some lumber and his carpentry tools," Elrond said.

While this all transpired, Fili and Thorin stood awkwardly near Kili's bed. "What are you doing?" Thorin finally asked.

"I am having one of our carpenters attach a railing that will keep Kili from falling out of bed. Hopefully, this will enable Fili to get some real rest. One less thing to worry about," he explained.

Thorin was surprised. He had not expected the elves to be so accommodating and kind. "Thank you," he grumbled. Fili hadn't said anything for a while. Thorin turned to look for him, smiling when he found him. Fili had fallen asleep perched precariously between a chair and Kili's bed.

Gellamon worked quickly and quietly, attaching the board to the bed. He bid them good bye and left. Elrond took an armload of pillows and lined both sides of the bed with them. Satisified, he moved back to the three dwarves.

Thorin walked to inspect the elf's work. Finding no glaring faults, he nodded his approval and went back to his nephews. Fili had awoken and was pacing around.

"My legs fell asleep," he muttered.

"I believe more than just your legs had fallen asleep, nephew," Thorin said. "It will be very good for you to get a solid night's sleep."

"May I move Kili to his new bed?" Elrond asked, knowing that Thorin would not appreciate it if he picked up the boy without his permission. Thorin nodded, and Elrond gently lifted Kili into his arms, mindful of his injured shoulder. As he was carrying the young dwarf, his precious burden went into a seizure. Thankfully the elf had a good hold on Kili. He slowly laid the still seizing dwarfling onto his modified bed, careful to turn him slightly on his side.

Kili was gasping and his lips started to turn blue before he finally ceased seizing. He immediately fell back asleep. "Why don't you stop the fits like you did earlier?" Fili demanded, tired of watching his brother suffer.

"It does not work every time, and it drains my healing powers that would be better used elsewhere." Fili nodded that he understood. "I will make sure Kili is checked in on frequently throughout the night, so that you may both rest uninterrupted." He started to leave, but Thorin stopped him.

"I'd like to speak with you outside. Let me put my nephews to bed and then we will speak," Thorin said. Elrond agreed and went to walk down the path a ways. Thorin turned to Fili. "Fili. You need to sleep. Do not argue with me," he said, wanting to stop Fili arguing before he started. "You're brother is in good hands, and if you want to be any good to him, you need to be well rested."

"Yes, uncle," he whispered. He kissed his brother on the forehead and crawled into the adjacent bed, turning so he could look at Kili. Thorin walked to Fili's bed and kissed his forehead like he'd done when the boys were much younger. Given the circumstances, the gesture seemed appropriate and necessary.

Fili wrinkled his face at the tickle of Thorin's beard, making Thorin chuckle. Thorin then walked to Kili's bed and kissed his forehead as well. Even in his sleep, the dwarfling wrinkled his nose just like his brother. Thorin glanced once more at the boys as he exited the room.

Elrond was waiting on a bridge for Thorin. "I wanted to thank you for your hospitality. You seem to genuinely care for my kin, and that is far more than I anticipated." Elrond nodded and waited for Thorin to continue. "In your opinion, will my nephew recover?"

"I do not know. Tomorrow I will spend more time with him to determine the extent of the damage. Then I will know more. Tonight, I would recommend you get some rest," Elrond answered honestly.

"I appreciate your honesty. Now, I am going to check on my company." Thorin walked off in the direction of the other dwarves.


	6. Chapter 6

The next morning Fili woke to a strange noise. He sat up in bed and looked over to his brother's bed. Kili was making a noise somewhere between a moan and a mewl. Fili rushed to his bed. When Kili saw his brother's face, he immediately relaxed, but he still looked very unsure.

"Do you know where we are, brother?" Kili shook his head, wincing. "We're in Rivendell, with the elves. They're fixing you up," Fili explained. "Do you want to sit up a bit, Kili?" Kili nodded. Fili gathered a few more pillows, pulled Kili into a sitting position, and piled the pillows up behind his brother. As he lowered Kili back down, he quickly adjusted the pillows so Kili looked more comfortable. "Comfortable?"

Kili smiled. Fili noticed now that the adorably crooked smile he'd always had was now a little more crooked. He didn't dwell on that, and instead decided to make Kili keep smiling. It was a nice sight to see. "Ma would cringe to see how you are being spoiled. You have more pillows on your bed right now than there are in all of Ered Luin." More crooked smiling, and also a sharp exhale of air that seemed to be a chuckle. Fili brought a chair and propped his feet up on the rail of Kili's bed.

Before Fili could coax out any more crooked smiles, Elrond walked in. "Good morning. I was hoping you would be awake," he said, smiling. "If Kili is up to it, I would like to spend some time with him, trying to ascertain just how much damage was done." Kili tensed slightly, so Elrond continued, "It won't hurt. I just need to talk to you."

When he'd received an agreement from Kili, Fili tried to get out of the way. He sat on the foot of Kili's bed, as there was plenty of room there due to the fact that the bed was elf-sized. Elrond hovered over Kili, observing how his eyes were moving and asking him to look certain directions.

He tried to get Kili to follow his instructions, but the dwarfling looked solely at Fili. He had been afraid it would come to this. He'd had to separate his own sons numerous times to get one or the other's full attention.

"Fili, I need you to deliver a message to Mithrandir, to Gandalf," he said, scribbling down a hasty note, folding it, and handing it to Fili. The young dwarf looked at his brother, not wanting to leave him. "Kili will be fine. This message is quite urgent, however," he added. In actuality, the message simply said 'Please find a way to occupy this young dwarf so that I may tend to his brother in peace.'

Fili was trying to read the Elf's expression, but couldn't. "Okay. Kili, I'll be right back," he said to his brother, smiling. Kili looked unsure, biting his lip. To both Fili's and Elrond's surprise, Kili eventually nodded. Fili took the paper and left, Kili watching him go.

Elrond asked Kili to wiggle his fingers after releasing his hand from the binding for his injured shoulder. He seemed to have a lot of trouble getting his left fingers to respond, because they were curled into a fist. Elrond wasn't sure if his hand did this because of the shoulder injury or due to some type of nerve damage. He feared t was the latter because the dwarfling's left foot was also very tense, curling inwardly.

Seeing the tension and weakness in the dwarf's left side in conjunction with the fact that most of his seizures were confined to that side did not bode well. In his thousands of years of healing, he'd seen only a handful of head injuries resulting in that type of crippling, and even fewer in which the patient regained full use of those limbs.

Before he had time to further dwell on this, Kili started to seize, pitching to the left and into the pillows lined against the bed. He convulsed for over a minute, but even after he stilled, consciousness did not return fully. He stared at the ceiling and moved his mouth as though eating. All attempts to get his attention failed. It was another few minutes before his mind seemed to return to the present.

"Are you back with me, penneth?" Elrond asked softly, leaning to try to catch the dwarf's gaze. Very sluggishly, Kili met Elrond's eyes, his eyelids drooping dramatically. His eyes then roved around. Elrond immediately understood what he was looking for. He was searching for his brother. When he did not see Fili, he began to panic, breathing erratically. Before Elrond could attempt to calm him, he began to whine, his face screwing up.

Elrond gently turned Kili's face to look at him. "Hush, Kili. Fili is not in the room. He went to deliver a message and will be back soon. You are safe," he said softly, yet in a commanding tone.

Kili resisted briefly, but then relaxed.

"I have a few questions for you, and then you may rest," the elf said. Elrond noted that his gaze was shaky and faltering, and he seemed detached. Despite the effort on Elrond's part, Kili was unable to answer the questions, and Elrond was fairly certain that the dwarfling was only grasping parts, if any, of what he was saying.

Fili entered in a flurry. "I do not appreciate being sent on fools' errands," he said.

"I needed Kili to pay attention to someone other than yourself. You were distracting him and I sent you away to ascertain Kili's level of functioning," Elrond said simply. "We are finished, though, so I will leave the two of you alone."

Fili took his place again in the chair beside Kili's bed as his younger brother fell asleep yet again. Elrond left the dwarves alone and went in search of their uncle, finally able to give him the answers he was looking for regarding his nephew, though he knew they were not the answers he was hoping for.


	7. Chapter 7

Elrond found Thorin sitting and smoking a pipe with Gandalf. "Mithrandir, may I speak with Thorin privately?" he asked, eyeing the pipes with a hint of disdain. The wizard knew very well how he felt about smoking the things. Gandalf stood stiffly and took his leave.

"Kili?" Thorin asked, hesitating slightly. Elrond nodded. "I take it you have bad news for me?"

"I believe he will live. The wound will not kill him. There seems to be nerve damage to the left side of his body. Already, tightness as well as severe weakness has taken hold of both his left arm and leg. I have also noticed that the seizures he suffers from affect mostly that side. I am sorry I do not have better news."

"What does that mean? Will he recover?" Thorin asked, though he knew the answer.

"That is still unknown. It is still too soon to know whether or not he will regain full use of those limbs. I have not mentioned any of this to Fili. I thought the news would be best coming from you."  
"Thank you," Thorin said, standing up. "I am going to speak with my nephew." Elrond stood as well, putting a slightly unsure hand on Thorin's shoulder. He was unsure how he would react to the physical contact, and was surprised when Thorin reached up and put a hand on his, nodding.

Upon turning away from the elf, Thorin saw Bofur. He'd been waiting awkwardly for the two to be finished speaking, not wanting to interrupt or look like he was eavesdropping.

"Bofur. Do you need something?" he asked.

"Oh, no. I was coming to see if I could see Kili. I think it will do my heart good to see him," he said, somewhat nervously.

"I am on my way to the boys now. Walk with me," Thorin said, smiling gratefully. "I need to have a conversation with Fili, and I believe he would be far more willing to briefly part with his brother if you were to sit with Kili."

Kili was sleeping peacefully when they joined his nephews once more. "Fili. I need to speak with you. Bofur will stay with Kili should he wake in your absence," Thorin said, sounding more cold than he intended. He tried again. "I would like to talk in private. Bofur has asked to see Kili, and he will be able to keep Kili comfortable while we speak." Fili nodded, quietly walking towards his uncle.

Once they were out of earshot of both the sleeping Kili and Bofur, Thorin sighed. "Did Lord Elrond figure out if Kili will recover? He spent much of the day with him, after sending me on a wild goose chase with Gandalf," Fili said, shaking his head. Thorin quirked an eyebrow, and Fili elaborated, "The wizard had me pouring over old texts for him, claiming that his vision was not what it once was."

Thorin chuckled, wishing he did not have to dampen Fili's surprisingly chipper mood with the unpleasant news he bore. "This is about Kili. Unfortunately, Lord Elrond is not optimistic about his recovery. His left side seems to be damaged irreparably, and the seizures will plague him as long as he lives. Elrond does not, however, believe his condition will worsen greatly, which should be counted as a blessing."

Fili blanched. He knew deep down that his baby brother's full recovery was very unlikely, but now that it had been put to words, it felt like a knife to his gut.

"But what of the quest?" Fili asked, bringing up the question that had brought him so much anxiety over the last few days.

"I think you know the answer to that. He will stay here until we reclaim the mountain. We will then return for him and care for him there." Thorin had made that decision at the moment he saw the kindness of the elves.

"Then I will stay with him," Fili said.

"I cannot allow that. You belong with the company."

"I belong with my brother," Fili replied, looking his uncle in the eye. "You cannot expect me to leave him here alone."

"You're brother will be safe here. The elves have shown him great care and concern thus far. Don't be a fool." Thorin put a hand on Fili's shoulder, but Fili shoved away from him and went back in to his brother who had awoken and was listening to Bofur give a recount of the company's shenanigans since arriving in Rivendell.

Thorin sighed. That did not go as he had hoped it would. He ran into Balin as he walked slowly back to the company's quarters.

"How is the lad? Bofur just passed this way and he said Kili seems more alert than he was previously," Balin said.

"That is true. Do not trust a hope, however. I have been informed that he will not walk again. He will likely never regain his speech, and his left side is all but crippled entirely." Thorin hadn't even looked Balin in the eye.

Balin looked sadly at his king, finally catching his gaze. "He will stay here, then? I am assuming we will still proceed to the mountain?"

"Yes. Kili will stay here. I may have to tie Fili up to get him away from his brother. I wish Kili could go back to his mother. She would handle this much better than I."

"Why not send for Dis?" I'm sure Gandalf has ways of sending messages with more speed than usual," Balin offered. "You do not need to worry yourself with that though. I will see what I can do. But furst, some of the lads were hoping to visit young Kili, only a few at a time. Would you permit it?"

"I think Kili, and especially Fili would enjoy the company. And thank you," Thorin said, the genuine sadness and gratitude shining through.

Balin nodded and walked to the gazebo where the two princes were. When he walked in, Kili was awake, blinking owlishly and twisting the sheets in his right hand. Fili was worriedly trying to get Kili's attention.

Balin quietly joined Fili, putting a hand on his shoulder. Fili glanced at him, mouth tense. "I'm not leaving him," he whispered. Kili chose that moment to come back to reality, gasping. "Shh. I'm right here," he soothed.

Kili glanced at Balin, brow creasing in confusion. It took several agonizing seconds before recognition dawned. "Oh, laddie. It is good to see you looking so alert," Balin said, with a still sad smile.

Kili raised his eyebrows and picked up his right hand, reaching to grab Balin's hand that was resting on the side of the bed. This warmed Balin's heart, and tears began to well up in his eyes. When Kili saw the tears, he looked at Fili, alarmed.

"They're happy tears, Kili. Balin's happy," Fili explained. Kili seemed to understand.

"If you're up to it, the others would love to come by and see you. Would you like some company?" Balin asked. Kili grinned crookedly and nodded. Fili was excited for some company as well.

"I believe Kili has grown weary of having only me to entertain him," he said, laughing. "Having Bofur here a bit ago was a very welcome surpri-." Fili was cut off when Kili began seizing again. The seizure was relatively short, less than half a minute. There was blood on Kili's lips, and Fili gasped. Kili groaned and opened his mouth, gagging at the taste of blood. Balin quickly inspected the young dwarf's mouth.

"Do not be alarmed. He has just bitten his tongue, but it does not seem to be too severe. Give him some water to wash out the taste," Balin instructed. Fili brought a cup to Kili's lips and he took a few sips. "Better?" Balin asked. Kili nodded miserably.

"I think maybe we should wait a while before visitors. Kili needs to rest. These seizures really take it out him," Fili said, standing up.

"I'm sure the lads will understand. Get some rest, Kili," he said, patting Kili's knee and walking away. Kili was asleep before Balin was out the door.

\---Later that evening---

Balin had been wandering around in search of his king for almost an hour when he finally found Thorin smoking a pipe near an intricate fountain. "Thorin. I've spoken with both Gandalf and Lord Elrond. They have come up with a solution," he said, sitting opposite Thorin.

"What have they come up with?" Thorin asked.

"Lord Elrond's twin sons will go to Ered Luin and escort Dis back here," Balin answered. Thorin seemed disappointed. That would take too long. They couldn't wait for her to arrive before departing. "The Great Eagles will be providing the transportation, cutting travel down to several days at most."

Thorin had difficulty finding words. The relief he felt was strong enough to knock the wind out of his lungs. "I do not know what to say. Thank you for all of your help. I am going to bring this good news to Fili, although I'm not sure he'll want to see me."

"The boy's been through unimaginable heartbreak this week. Do not take his words or actions to heart just yet. He just needs time," Balin reminded Thorin. Balin had always been a great diffuser of tension, and since the quest began, he had diffused a number of situations between him and his nephews.

Thorin had to wake Fili in order to tell him the news. The blonde had fallen asleep in the chair beside Kili's bed again. "Uncle, what is it?" he asked, rubbing his eyes.

"Your mother will be here in a few days time. The Great Eagles have agreed to assist in getting her here quickly. She will stay with Kili here until they can both be brought to Erebor," he answered, unsure if he should continue by asking Fili if this changed his mind about continuing with the company. He decided against it, hoping that Dis would be able to convince him to continue on.

Fili's eyes welled up with tears. He wished Kili was awake so that he too could hear this. Thorin smiled and clasped Fili's shoulders before leaving. Fili looked at Kili who was sleeping peacefully, breathing deeply. Satisfied that he was comfortable and safe, Fili prepared for bed and climbed into the bed he'd slept on the previous night.

He cried himself to sleep, but they were happy tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took some liberties this chapter in order to get the characters where I needed...


	8. Chapter 8

Dis was most definitely surprised when two elves and what appeared to be a human child arrived in Ered Luin. Word of their arrival had traveled quickly. It was even more surprising when they sought her out.

"Are you the lady Dis?" one of the elves asked, having run into her outside her home. She swallowed her Dwarven pride and mustered up the strength to answer them with dignity.

"I am. And who are you?"

"I am Elladan, and these are my brothers Elrohir and Estel. We were sent by Lord Elrond of Rivendell. We have news of your kin."

Dis' heart stopped. Elladan continued. "They all still live, but your son Kili has been injured. We would like to escort you to Imladris to join your kin there." Dis did not speak, but entered her home, grabbed a cloak, and hastily filled a pack with necessities. She exited the home and began walking down the path, past the three sons of Elrond.

Elladan glanced at Elrohir, who shrugged and took off after the dwarrowdam. "I am assuming you mean to go to Rivendell." Elrohir stated obviously.

"You assume correct, master elf. Are we to walk there or take ponies?" Dis asked, not slowing down.

The human child had run up beside them, grinning. "Neither! We're riding on giant eagles!" he exclaimed. The boy was no more than eight or nine years old, and in Dis' opinion, far too young to be so far from home. Just from the little time she'd spent with him, he reminded her of Kili, full of joy and the confidence that can only come from having attentive and protective older siblings.

Elladan sighed. "They are the Great Eagles, not the giant eagles, little brother. They have graciously agreed to fly us to Rivendell so that you may join your kin all the sooner. We will meet them down the road a bit."

Dis nodded. They walked on. Estel would run ahead, find something interesting to look at, and then have to run to catch up with the group. Elrohir played a chasing game with him for a while.

After several miles, Dis spoke again. "How badly injured is my son?"

"He has suffered a severe head injury. It seems he was kicked by a pony. He has been awake much of the time he's been with the elves, but not necessarily aware. His brother hasn't left his side," Elladan explained.

"Of course he hasn't," Dis sighed. "They are inseparable. Is there anything else? I feel as though you are not telling me everything."

Elladan nodded. "He hasn't spoken since the accident, and it takes him longer to seem to recognize his friends. He has also suffered many seizures and staring spells. It is unlikely that he will walk again without help."

"I appreciate your honesty," Dis said, having steeled herself for the worst. They came upon the Eagles shortly. Estel ran ahead and climbed roughly onto one of the Eagle's waiting backs, making his older brothers cringe at his behavior.

"Estel, you must be more gentle. Ada taught you better manners than that!" Elladan scolded. Estel didn't seem to hear him, though. When they were all situated, the Eagle's took off.

They flew until the sky turned inky black. Dis' mind was reeling with news of her baby. He may never walk again. Head injuries were an unfortunately common event for dwarves in the mines and other such activities. She thought of Bifur and the hardship that family went through following his wound. He did not wake for weeks, and when he did wake, he was far from unchanged.

The Eagles flew on through the night, and their riders rested on and off. Estel was on one eagle with one of the elves. Dis was pretty sure it was Elrohir, but the two were identical, so she couldn't be positive. The little boy had fallen asleep some time ago in his brother's arms. She was on an Eagle with Elladan. He had offered Dis his cloak to use as a pillow for her head, and she graciously accepted. These elves were nothing like those she'd always heard about.

They had landed briefly several times to allow the Eagle's to rest. Before the second sunrise, they were nearing Rivendell. The Eagles landed and bid farewell to their riders a little ways off from their destination. Elladan led Dis along a rocky path, and she gasped when the beauty of Rivendell came into view.

When they arrived in Rivendell, Thorin met his sister at the gate. Elrond had seen the Eagle's approach and informed him. Thorin embraced his sister and nodded his thanks to the three sons of Elrond.

"How is he? And how is Fili?" Dis asked. Thorin pursed his lips.

"Kili is much the same. I take it the elves told you of his condition?" Dis nodded.

"Take me to him." Thorin nodded and led his sister along the bridges and courtyards. She marveled at the beauty around her, but did not tarry. They approached the gazebo. Dis could see her eldest sitting on the foot of what she assumed to be Kili's bed, talking or singing, she couldn't tell. As they moved closer, Dis could hear Fili's voice singing a sad sweet lullaby. Kili was staring at the ceiling, occasionally glancing towards his brother.

Thorin stopped suddenly, overcome with emotion. Dis stopped as well, looking at her brother. "What is it?" she asked. She wanted to run to her sons, but seeing Thorin this broken was disturbing. Thorin just shook his head.

"I am just so happy you are here. You are so much stronger than I am, and the Kili has been in want of that strength. It has been a very trying two weeks for both your sons. The last few days have been especially hard. But do not let me keep you from your sons. I will wait here," Thorin said. Dis embraced her brother once more, unsure of what else to do. Thorin had not been this distraught or vulnerable in a very long time.

Fili had caught sight of his mother as they parted. He began to weep, smiling. He whispered something to Kili, who immediately began wiggling as much as his tired and damaged body would allow. He turned his head, desperately trying to find his mother.

Dis ran to her sons. Kili smiled, tears running down his face. Dis kissed his forehead and wiped away his tears. She turned to embrace her eldest son, not wanting to let go. Just as she released Fili and turned back to her youngest, Kili grimaced before going into a seizure. It was one of his bad ones that absolutely ravaged his weak body, stealing his breath and causing his lips to turn blue.

Thorin had joined them when he saw what was happening. The seizures had been significantly worse in the last few days, and Elrond had even had to use his healing powers to stop two of them that would not stop. Thankfully, this one did stop on it's own. It left the now sleeping Kili gasping. Dis had not moved nor had she shifted her gaze away from her baby.

"He's alright. That was one of his bad seizures. They are not always like that. He'll rest for a bit, and when he wakes up he is fine," Thorin assured Dis. Dis nodded blankly. Fili pushed her into a chair.

"Thank you, Fili," she said, finally looking away from Kili's exhausted body. She looked at Fili's face, concerned. "You need to rest. You look like you haven't slept in days," she soothed. "You have worn yourself ragged with concern for Kili." Fili nodded, eyes welling up again. "Sleep. I will be here when you wake up," she said, pulling him down so she could kiss his forehead.

Fili laid on the neighboring bed, and Dis scooted her chair slightly so that she could see both of her son's faces.

"You too, brother," she said, glancing at Thorin. "You need to rest as well. There seems to be another bed in the corner. Sleep," she said. There was no point in arguing with his sister. He walked heavily to that bed and laid down without even bothering to take off his boots. He fell asleep quickly and slept more soundly and restfully than he had in two weeks.


	9. Chapter 9

Dis watched her kin sleep. She smiled when she heard both Fili and Thorin snoring softly. They had been sleeping for almost an hour, and Kili had woken several times during that hour. He would look around, see his mother, smile, and fall asleep again. This didn't surprise Dis one bit, however. Kili had always been a light sleeper, usually tossing and turning constantly.

One of his awakenings was different, however. He tossed his head fitfully and grimaced. Dis remembered that he had grimaced before the last seizure and stood. Although she was prepared for this one, watching her son go through another seizure felt like someone had punched her in the stomach. This one was far shorter than the last, and when he stilled, Dis wiped the drool from his face and stroked his hair.

He watched his mother intently, brow furrowing and hand scrabbling. Dis heard heavy footsteps behind her. Thorin joined them, putting an arm around Dis' shoulders. It seemed Kili had finally gotten his arm to cooperate. He reached towards Dis, looking upset. Dis got right in front of his face. "My sweet boy. You're alright." He had tears streaming down his face and his eyebrows were drawn tightly together. He bit his lip and shook his head, groaning.

It was not a groan of pain or discomfort. It sounded like a groan of frustration. Thorin and Dis had heard it many times during weapons training and school work respectively. Though Kili was quite talented at both, there always came a point when he grew frustrated. In the past, that groan of frustration was usually followed by an exclamation that he was giving up.

Thankfully he never did give up. Had he quit all the times he said he would, he would not be the talented warrior he is now.

Kili had calmed down and now he was listening to his mother speaking encouragements to him. Suddenly he smiled and pulled her closer. She understood the gesture and gently pulled him into a comforting hug. They stayed like this for some time, Kili weeping silently, not willing to let go.

After some time, Dis carefully lowered Kili back onto the bed. It was nearly dark outside. Kili whined at the loss of contact. "Hush, baby. I'm not going anywhere. Go back to sleep," Dis cooed. Kili shook his head, scowling. He dug his fingers into Dis's sleeve, refusing to allow her to back up. Dis sighed. She stood holding his hand until he fell asleep several quiet minutes later.

When she was sure he was sleeping deeply enough for her to remove her hand, she went back to the chair Fili had gotten for her.

"I am so sorry, Dis. He should never have come," Thorin said, pulling up another chair.

Dis looked at Thorin. "This is not your fault, brother. I do not blame you. I allowed Kili to come on this quest with his brother," she said, tutting. They were silent for a few minutes. "Now, you should return to bed. We can speak more in the morning."

"You should sleep as well, sister. The elves check in often throughout the night to ensure that Kili is comfortable, so you needn't stay up all night with him," Thorin said. "I will leave the last bed to you and find another place to lay my head."

"I will stay with him a while longer," she responded. Thorin left, and Dis closed her eyes. Kili shifted, and Dis reached for his hand again. She didn't know how much time had passed, but when she was sure he was sleeping comfortably, she laid down on the other bed, just intending to rest her eyes momentarily.

Next morning:

The next morning, Dis woke to Fili's voice. He was talking to Kili. She lay there a few more minutes, reveling in the sound. She did not move, until she heard a moan. Fili was hushing his brother, comforting him.

By the time she got over to Kili's bed, the seizure was over. When Kili saw his mother, he lurched, seemingly attempting to sit up. "Woah, brother. Slow down!" Fili lightly scolded. But Kili didn't seem to hear his brother, of if he did, he was ignoring him. He wriggled and tossed until he was on his side. He didn't get any further than that and huffed indignantly, turning his face into the bed. "Do you want some help?" Fili asked. Kili nodded dejectedly and whined.

Fili lifted Kili into a sitting position, holding his head up with one hand and supporting his back with the other. Dis noticed that her son was weaker than she had realized. He did not seem to be able to hold his head up, and Fili had all of his weight. She piled pillows up so that Kili could sit up comfortably. His head lolled weakly.

"Better?" Fili asked. Kili nodded. Just then, Dis was startled by a young elf maiden who had silently walked up beside her.

"I have Kili's breakfast," she said. "Are you his mother? Are you Dis?" she asked, turning to look at Dis.

"I am. What is your name?" Dis responded.

"Arwen. My brothers are the ones who brought you here. I do hope they behaved themselves," Arwen answered, smiling. Dis smiled back and assured her that they were very well behaved. "And Fili, your uncle is looking for you. He says he has an important matter to discuss with you over breakfast." He nodded, smiled at his brother, and left to find Thorin.

Kili's breakfast consisted of a sweet smelling loaf and mashed fruit. It is what he ate every morning, and he was getting sick of it. He wrinkled his nose. Arwen handed Dis the tray of food and left as well. She set it at the end of Kili's bed and picked up the bowl of mashed fruit.

"You are lucky, Kili. We are not accustomed to such fresh fruit!" she said. Kili just looked at her and wrinkled his nose. "Oh, don't you make that face. You always were a picky eater." She began to feed him spoonfuls of the fruit. She turned when she heard footsteps behind her. Fili had run back in.

"I forgot something," he said, rushing to put his boots on.

"You forgot to put on your boots?" Dis asked, chuckling. Fili smiled sheepishly and nodded, coming to join his mother and brother again.

"Kili. Why are you letting mum feed you?" Fili asked, shaking his head. "Ma, he is perfectly capable of feeding himself. He is tricking you into doing it for him. He wouldn't let me so much as look at him like I intended to help him without pitching a fit, but for some reason he is content to let you." Kili smiled and exhaled sharply in what Fili had come to recognize as a laugh. "Don't feel bad, though, Ma. He had Arwen feeding him for three days before I caught on."

Dis just laughed. She was so happy to see her son's personality still shining through. Fili took the bowl and was about to set it in his brother's lap when Kili suddenly went into a seizure. Fili hovered until it was over, gently pulling Kili back to where he had been propped. He patted Kili's stomach and set the food down before leaving again.

Kili took the spoon when Dis handed it to him. He held it awkwardly in his right hand, shaking slightly. It was quite difficult for Dis to not reach and steady his hand or help him bring the spoon to his mouth. She beamed with pride as Kili scooped up some of the fruit and shakily brought the spoon to his mouth. It was slow going, but he managed to eat the entire bowl. She handed him the loaf but he wrinkled his nose again and shook his head.

"Alright. We will save it for later," she said, setting it on the tray again. Kili suddenly grew very agitated. His eyes searched for something and when he didn't find what he was looking for he huffed. Dis immediately knew that he was looking for his brother. He must not have remembered him leaving.

Even though she knew what he was upset about, she wanted to see if he could tell her. " What are you looking for?" she asked, casually. Kili looked at her, eyebrows up as if to say, 'don't pretend you don't know'. She shrugged, taking his hand and curling it into a fist. She took the fist and bumped it against his forehead lightly before bringing it towards his other hand, which had been released from its bindings days before Dis arrived. This was a somewhat modified form of the Igleshmek sign for 'brother'. Kili had been taught this long ago as part of his lessons. She looked at his face praying for a spark of recognition at the sign.

Kili's eyebrows shot up. He repeated the sign several more times, looking excitedly at his mother. He then showed her the sign for mother. She practically squealed and kissed his cheek, making him pull a face. She ignored his silent protest and kissed the other cheek. He grinned.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay between chapters!

Fili found Thorin sitting at one of the low tables near where the company was staying. "How is Kili this morning?" he asked.

"He is very alert. A great improvement over the last several days," Fili answered. "He did try to get mum to feed him, though." Thorin chuckled. Fili seemed well rested and more at ease than he'd been since that first night. He sat down across from Thorin and started picking at some food that was sitting on the table. It looked like the food that the rest of the company had passed up.

"Having his mother here will make all the difference. Which brings me to an uncomfortable question. Have you reconsidered your stance on whether you will continue on with the company?" Balin had encouraged Thorin to honor Fili's choice on the matter when they first argued over it.

Fili chewed on some green vegetable for a moment. He had been agonizing over the decision since his mother had arrived. He did feel much more at ease to even leave his brother briefly with Dis here. Deep down, he knew that he would continue on with his uncle. This quest was even more important now; Kili needed a stable home to recover in.

"I haven't stopped thinking about it. Seeing Kili light up when he sees mum has been very helpful. I finally feel like I can relax and that he will be all right in the end. I will continue with the quest." Fili said it all quite quickly but did not break eye contact with Thorin.

Thorin was relieved. He had hoped Fili would come to this conclusion, but he knew that the more he tried to push him to make this decision, the more Fili would push back. He was after all, his blood.

They spoke a bit more about plans and timelines, but Fili was only half listening. He was a bit preoccupied with fear over how he would tell Kili what was going to happen. For the two weeks before Dis arrived, Kili would work himself up crying and whining when Fili wasn't in his line of sight. As much as Fili hated himself to admit this, he was exhausted by this. He had been Kili's sole caregiver and companion for that time.

Fili was snapped out of these thoughts by Thorin placing a hand on his shoulder and looking at him with an expectant look.

"I'm sorry, uncle. I was not listening," Fili admitted.

"I gathered as much. It is not important. What are you thinking so hard about?" Thorin asked.

"I'm thinking about how hard this will be on Kili. He has grown so used to having me there to take care of him. Even with mother here, I fear it will devastate him."

"You cannot worry about that. He will take it in stride, and when we have reclaimed Erebor, it will all be forgotten," Thorin assured his nephew. He never was very good at these types of conversations. He hoped he was being encouraging, but he couldn't be sure. "In the meantime, please relieve your mother. I'd like to speak with her about our plans." Fili agreed and left to return to his brother's side.

Kili was smiling when Fili rounded the corner. He hadn't noticed his brother enter and was looking intently at his mother. Dis was holding his hand and talking. Fili could hear her repeating the word "uncle". He was confused and approached the two.

Kili noticed Fili and grinned. Dis turned to see what Kili had gotten so excited about. She looked back at Kili. "What? Who is that?" she asked, excitedly. Fili continued to be incredibly confused. Kili had a look of concentration on his face. Dis tapped his hand and his face lit up. He shakily signed "brother". And repeated the sign again, and again, and again, sticking his tongue out slightly.

Fili laughed out loud. He had made fun of Kili for that little quirk since they were tiny dwarflings. Whenever Kili had to concentrate on something, whether it was academic work or weapons training, Kili would unconsciously stick his tongue out. Kili had worked incredibly hard to abolish the habit, but was mostly unsuccessful, except when he practiced archery. Somehow, archery took far less concentration for Kili than learning to spell.

"Good job, Kee! Mum's going to have you talking soon!" he said, plopping down at the foot of Kili's bed.

"Kili. Who am I?" Dis asked. Kili's eyes lit up again, but before he could respond, he grimaced deeply. He looked like he was about to cry. After a few heavy breaths, he started seizing. He flew to the left and hit his face on the railing. Fili crawled up beside his brother carefully and gently taking the pillows from behind Kili so he was not propped up so high.

They waited. He convulsed long enough and violently enough that Fili started panicking, looking around expectantly for Elrond. Thankfully, Kili finally stilled, keening airily. His eyes rolled around and his forehead creased.

"Kili, can you look at me? Are you back with us?" Fili asked quietly. Kili didn't respond. He flopped limply onto his back and stared at the ceiling, licking his lips. His eyelids drooped, but he seemed to be fighting sleep. after several harsh breaths, he gave in and fell asleep, his breathing evening out.

Fili smiled reassuringly at Dis. "Don't worry, Ma. That is as bad as it gets. He will sleep for a while, and then be okay. He wont wake for a while, though," he said softly. Dis nodded, looking at Fili. She smiled at him.

"I am very proud of you, Fili," she said, simply. Fili smiled half-heartedly. He was feeling weary, dreading having to leave his kin.

"Uncle would like to talk with you. He is on that first patio by where the rest are staying. Do you think you can find your way?" Fili asked. Dis looked unsure, but didn't have to answer because Thorin walked in.

"I was wondering what was keeping you, sister. Is everything alright in here?" he asked. He immediately kicked himself for his word choice. Everything was not all right. No one else seemed to be bothered by his choice of words though.

He looked at his sister and her sons and immediately understood what had kept his sister. Between Kili's slow, heavy breathing and the slightly overwhelmed look on Fili's face, he knew that Kili must have had another seizure. Fili always had the same look on his face after Kili's more intense seizures. It was a look of exhaustion and barely concealed panic.

Fili glanced up at his uncle before leaning his head against the wall where he was sitting again at the foot of Kili's bed.

"Did you want to talk to me, Thorin?" Dis asked, standing. Thorin and Dis walked out of the room.

Fili looked over at his sleeping brother, guilt rolling over him for the impending departure. "It'll be worth it, Kee. I promise," he whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment and let me know what you guys are thinking!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm SO SO SO sorry I screwed up the chapters! It will make so much more sense now that you have the 'real' chapter 11!

"I'm right here, Kee. I just fell asleep," Fili said, patting Kili's leg. While Kili had slept, Thorin, Dis, and Fili had discussed how best to tell Kili what the plan was. They decided that Dis would be the one to tell him, which Fili was incredibly grateful for.

They also decided that the sooner they told Kili, the better. It would give him more time to process it. When Dis saw that Kili was awake, she stood from the chair she had been sitting in across the room.

"Hi, Kili," she said, touching his cheek. She turned to Fili and Thorin and motioned for them to leave. She wanted to talk to Kili alone to break the news. Fili and Thorin left to join the company for dinner.

The conversation had apparently gone well. Fili had a nagging fear that Kili didn't actually understand, even though he nodded to indicate that he did. He didn't dwell on that. He and Dis spent the rest of the day practicing signs with Kili and getting him to eat his dinner. Dis had to threaten Kili to get him to eat enough. She wanted him to eat enough to get his strength up, and threatened to brush his hair and put it in braids if he did not cooperate.

That night, they all slept well.

In the three days that followed, Kili improved in leaps and bounds. He was sitting up higher and supporting his head more and more. Dis was pushing him to use the few signs he'd mastered.

One afternoon, Kili seemed to notice his left hand for the first time. His brow furrowed and he glared down at the crippled limb. He slowly extended his elbow and uncurled his fist, pressing his now flat hand against the bed to keep the fingers from curling again. Fili was relieved that he could move the hand somewhat purposefully, but Kili seemed exhausted just from those two slight movements and his limb shook with the effort. Kili let the hand curl back into a fist, but wedged his fist under his leg to keep the arm somewhat straight. "That's good, brother. That's very good," Fili said, almost to himself.

It was decided that the company would stay in Rivendell for one more week before continuing onto the mountain. Fili wasn't sure if Kili grasped what that meant, so he tried to prepare his brother by explaining it frequently.

"Do you remember what is going to happen next week?" Fili asked Kili, who was sitting up almost completely. His head would drop forwards every once in a while, but for the most part, he was able to keep his head up on his own. His bad hand was wedged under his thigh. Ever since he remembered that that limb was attached to him, he'd tucked it as tightly as he could under or against his body. Fili thought it may have been out of frustration at his inability to make that limb cooperate.

Kili looked at his brother. He nodded, the weakness making the nod somewhat clumsy.

"Would you mind telling me? Just so I know you've got the right idea in that head of yours?" Fili pressed. He watched Kili's hand. Fili and Dis had helped come up with a small repertoire of Igleshmek signs modified that relied mostly on one cooperative hand. After a moment, Kili made the sign for 'go'.

"Okay, and who is going?" Another moment passed. Kili signed 'brother', using his shoulder in place of the second hand that the sign usually required. Kili looked up at Fili, who nodded. "And who else?" Kili signed 'uncle', looking again at Fili for approval. "You've got it! Uncle and I, and the rest of the company, are leaving in a few days. And who is staying here?" he asked, signing the word 'stay' hoping to drive the message home. Kili bit his lip before signing 'mother' and then pointing to himself. "That's right. You and mother will stay here until it is safe. Do you remember where uncle and I are going?" he asked, unsure. He hadn't drilled Kili as much with this question.

Kili looked at Fili, shaking his head. "We're going to reclaim our homeland. Then we will be in our rightful home, uncle will be king, and we will be princes. Got it?" Kili didn't respond. He was grimacing, and Fili unconsciously prepared for the seizure he knew was coming. He quickly pulled some pillows from behind Kili, lowering him back down slowly. When the seizure started, he brushed hair away from Kili's gaping mouth and waited.

Kili gasped when the seizure abated. Fili pulled the blanket up around Kili's chest. "Hi, brother," he said smiling. Kili looked blankly at him, already drifting. "Sleep," Fili encouraged, waiting until Kili fell asleep before backing away from the bed.

Dis had watched all of this transpire from the doorway. She quietly approached and put her hand on Fili's back. "He's doing quite well, isn't he?" Fili asked his mother. "He's made more progress in the week you've been here than I thought he would make in months. And Lord Elrond agrees with that sentiment," he continued.

"I credit that to the ancient power called motherhood. I have always expected a lot out of my boys, and now is no different," she said.

They sat and talked for a while more. Kili woke up after having slept for a quarter of an hour. Sometimes he slept for hours after a seizure, and other times a short nap was enough.

He looked at his brother and then his mother, furrowing his brow in concentration. He signed 'go' and looked expectantly up at his mother, repeating it a few times for good measure.

Fili patted his brother's arm. "Yes. Uncle and I are going to go. Not today, though," he said. Kili huffed, shaking his head. He pointed to himself and then signed 'go' again. Fili froze. He had been afraid this would happen. "No, brother. You can't go yet. You will go when we come back for you. It is not safe for you," he tried to explain.

Kili shook his head. He pointed to himself, signed 'go', and then pointed outside, raising his eyebrows in question. "You want to go outside?" he asked. Kili nodded vigorously, making Dis laugh her musical laugh. Kili had inherited that laugh, and Fili longed to hear it again.

They had been seeing less and less of Elrond, as Kili's condition stabilized and his kin settled into their roles in caring for him. Fili thought that maybe they should run this by the elf, but then decided it was not necessary.

"Mum, will you grab some blankets? And maybe a pillow? I'll carry Kili and we can find a spot of grass. Have a picnic like we used to!" Fili said. He was giddy. Dis gathered what he had listed and waited at the door while Fili carefully picked up his brother.

Kili was far lighter in Fili's arms than he had expected, and it was then that he noticed how much weight Kili had lost. He made a mental note to have Bofur sneak in more sweets than he normally did during his daily visits. Bofur was the most consistent visitor Kili had. Fili had one arm under Kili's shoulders and the other under his knees.

His head hung back off of Fili's arm, and Dis tutted. "Kili, pick up that head. You will get a crook if you let it hang so," she said, gently pressing up on the back of Kili's head. He got the message and instead leaned his head on Fili's shoulder. They walked down the path a ways until they found a patch of green grass near an intricate fountain.

Dis spread out a blanket and set down the rest of the borrowed bedding. She sat on the blanket and instructed Fili to set Kili in her lap. Fili gently deposited Kili so he was leaning against Dis' chest, supported on both sides by her strong arms. His head lolled onto her upper arm and she smiled down at him.

Fili sat next to them. Kili's eyes were wide and he was grinning. He had only left his bed for several agonizingly embarrassing baths.

They sat for a while, Kili constantly looking around at all of the new sights. Fili scooted over to the fountain. He dipped his hands in and splashed Kili's face lightly. Kili made a high pitched noise of surprise and grinned even wider. What happened next caused Fili's world to stop for a moment. Kili laughed. It was not a long laugh, or even a very loud one, but it was definitely a laugh. Fili was thrilled beyond belief, and his eyes welled up with tears.

Dis was also crying. Kili looked at his mother and then his brother and looked upset. He reached towards Fili's face, which was now within arms reach, and touched the tears that were now streaming down his face.

"Happy tears, brother. We are so happy," Fili assured him. Dis took Kili's hand and helped him form 'happy' a few times.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Making more sense? :p I can't believe I did that... Here is chapter TWELVE.

They sat outside for a while more before Kili went into another seizure. Dis held him in her strong arms while his body tensed and jerked. "Oh, my sweet boy. What am I going to do with you?" she asked when his body relaxed. She continued to hold him in her arms as he fell asleep.

Fili pulled one of the other blankets over his sleeping brother. He then dragged a stone bench over so his mother could lean back against something. "Thank you, Fili," she said, resting her head against it. Fili grabbed the pillow they'd brought and curled up on his side next to his mother. He felt so peaceful and relaxed.

When Bofur was on his way to visit Kili as he did every day, he found the three still on the blanket. The boys were both fast asleep and Dis was singing softly to herself. He walked quietly and set a tray of sweets that he had acquired beside Dis. She looked up at him and smiled.

"Thank you, Bofur. That is very kind of you," she said. "You are a good friend to my boys." Bofur smiled shyly.

"It's nothing, really. Kili's been looking so scrawny lately, so I've been trying to fatten him up. This elf food is a problem though. Too much green. Even some of the sweets have green in them!"

Fili woke when Bofur had started to talk, and laughed. "He needs meat. And butter. And real bread," he added, sitting up. He glanced at Kili, but he was still sound asleep.

"I'll come back when the lads awake," Bofur said, taking his leave.

Dis and Fili talked of Ered Luin. They laughed and smiled, reminiscing about days when the boys were very young and foolish. Kili woke several minutes later. He seemed confused about his surroundings, but did not fuss.

"Hey, sleepy-head," Fili teased. Kili smiled and kicked his feet. Fili pulled the blanket off of Kili. He wanted to check his brother's bad foot. He was moving his arm more and more each day, and he wanted to see if his leg was improving as well.

Just as it had been since the accident, Kili's left toes curled and his foot curled inwards. Fili used a leafy branch to tickle both of Kili's feet. Kili gasped and wriggled, dragging his feet away from his brother's assault. Fili glanced at Kili's face, relieved to find he was still smiling. Encouraged, Fili continued. He remembered that Kili had straightened out his arm on his own, but needed to brace it against something to keep it that way.

"Ma, set him up a little higher. I want to check something." She dragged Kili up by the armpits. Fili took Kili's bad leg and bent it at the knee, placing Kili's foot flat against the ground. His ankle still tried to curl, causing Kili's foot to roll to the outside edge. Fili coaxed the foot gently, uncurling his toes and causing the brunette to wrinkle his nose.

As long as Fili kept his hands on Kili's ankle and foot, it stayed in its proper place. He was so caught up in what he was doing that he didn't notice Kili's smile had shifted to a look of discomfort. Kili moaned and used the strength he did possess to kick out with the leg that Fili was so focused on. Fili was startled and look at Kili, who was glowering back at him. He let Kili's leg return to a comfortable position and scooted back wordlessly.

Dis didn't say anything as this transpired. Their interaction reminded her of when they were younger. During the time before Kili was walking, Fili was afraid to touch his brother. He didn't want to hurt the tiny thing that they called his brother. Once he started crawling, Fili was not quite as cautious, but still did his best to not touch him.

When Kili started to walk, things changed. Fili would push, pull, and poke his now mobile baby brother almost constantly. He would manhandle his brother, curious about how Kili would react to things such as being poked in the belly button or being dragged by his foot across the kitchen. Kili was a very easy-going dwarfling and was incredibly patient with his big brother. Often, however, Fili would play a little too rough or Kili would grow weary of the treatment and the brunette would fall on the ground, crying.

It didn't take long for Kili to be back on his feet again, chasing his brother. This time was no different. Kili suddenly stopped frowning and smiled crookedly at Fili, looking expectantly between him and the fountain. Fili understood and filled his hands up before dumping the entire handful on top of Kili's head.

Elrond walked up to the trio, smiling. "I was wondering where my patient went."

"Kili wanted to go outside. I figured it was alright," Fili explained.

"I was actually going to suggest this. I'm sure he has grown weary of seeing the same room for a month. How is he doing today?" Elrond asked.

"He is doing really well. Aren't you, brother?" Fili answered. "Mum has him using signs more and more. That's how he told us he wanted to go outside." Elrond smiled. It had been wonderful to watch his young patient improve. When he first arrived, he barely acknowledge anyone besides Fili, and his eyes did not have the same spark they had now.

"Kili is very lucky to have you. The improvement I have seen in Kili since your arrival is more than I had ever thought possible," Elrond said to Dis. Dis, as was her style, brushed off the attention, diverting it to Fili instead.

"I may have helped, but it is Fili's unwavering attention that made all the difference." She would have continued to boast about her son but Kili went into another seizure, taking all three of them by surprise. Dis steadied him and brushed his hair from his face. When the seizure abated, Kili moaned and lay heavily in Dis' arms, gasping.

Elrond did a cursory check from where he was kneeling, not wanting to intrude on the family. Kili was out of his hands now, and the only care he needed was from his family. "Please let me know if I can do anything," he said. He placed a hand on Kili's head and took his leave.

"Let's get you back inside, my raven-haired darling. We will come out again tomorrow. And every day after that," Dis said. Fili bent to pick up his brother with Dis helping by lifting him from below. He shifted his arms wider so that Kili's head was supported in the crook of his elbow. Kili fell asleep while Fili walked.

Fili gently placed his baby brother back on his bed and Kili woke at the change of position. He blinked owlishly up at his brother before falling back asleep.

Bofur cam by later that afternoon. "Ah, lad. Look at you holding up your head!" he said. Kili was propped up and looking around the room. Kili looked at Bofur and paused before grinning. With someone other than Fili or Dis, there was always a pause before recognition dawned. When Bofur approached the bed, Fili moved back to his spot at the foot of Kili's bed.

Kili reached out his hand and then touched his head. He patted his head, looking expectantly at Bofur, who smiled. "I know, I know. Now, your mum says you've been learning more Igleshmek. And she said I should make you use it! So, tell me what you want," he said. Every time Bofur visited Kili, Kili wanted to wear Bofur's hat.

Kili huffed. He pointed to himself, biting his lip. It took a moment for him to remember, but he was able to shakily show the sign for 'want'. He faltered after that. Bofur wasn't sure he knew the sign for 'hat', but before he could assist, Kili patted his head, which was pretty close to the actual sign.

"I'd love to let you wear it, but you need to say please, lad!" Bofur teased, taking off his hat. Kili hastily signed 'please', and Bofur handed Kili the hat, which he awkwardly pulled onto his head. "Fili, Dis, I must insist that you go and take a walk. Take a break. Wander. Enjoy the day! Kili most definitely does not need three Dwarrow entertaining him," Bofur said, all but shooing them away.

Bofur had been careful to always make sure that Fili was eating, sleeping, and relaxing as he should. He had been in the lad's shoes many years ago, with his cousin Bifur, and he knew full well the emotional and physical exhaustion that came with caring for a loved one in such a way as this.

After one more glance at Kili, who was now smiling as Bofur sang animatedly, Fili and Dis walked down the path.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And cue the angst...

"Do you think Kili will be alright?" Fili asked. "With me leaving, I mean." Dis wanted to say yes. She wanted to tell him that it would be fine, but she wasn't sure it would be truthful. To be honest, she had been physically ill over her concern over her youngest and how he will react.

Dis did not want to add to the guilt that Fili was already feeling, though. It was a noble and selfless decision he'd made when he said he would continue on. "I think he will be alright, in the end. It will be hard for him, but he will get through it. And in a few months time, we will all be together again. In our rightful home."

"But will you be alright? We have made a great team, but when I was alone, it was incredibly hard. I'm not complaining, and I don't want you to think that I am bitter, but it was difficult. I couldn't leave his sight without him working himself up and crying out." Fili was quite worked up himself right now.

Dis just shook her head. "You will worry yourself to death. You forget that after your father died, I raised you both by myself. Kili was not a healthy, nor entirely happy, baby. He cried and screamed whenever he was awake. And when he slept it was only for a few hours at a time," she said.

"But you had uncle then, and me," Fili argued. Dis laughed.

"Your memory is a bit skewed, my son. You were very helpful, or at least you tried to be. But, while your intentions were pure, the execution was not as good. You would help me by doing the dishes, but I swear you broke more than you cleaned!"

"And Uncle?" Fili asked, smiling and wrapping an arm around his mother. "Wasn't he helpful?"

"Ha! Indeed, he was not. He worked long hours at the forge and was only home to eat and sleep. Not that he would have been much help anyways. The few times he did have the time, he got you so wound up that I hand to send you both outside. You sparred and wrestled for hours. And I was left with a fussy and miserable baby."

"And all this time I thought I was such a help to you!" Fili said laughing, but also with sadness in his eyes. "I'm sorry," he said, much more softly. Dis didn't know what Fili was apologizing for, and she wasn't even sure he knew.

The peace eventually had to come to an end. Too soon, the morning of the company's departure came. In family groups, the dwarves all came to say goodbye to Kili and Dis. Fili had disappeared shortly after breakfast.

Thorin came in last, apart from Fili, who was still missing. Thorin embraced his sister. "It wont be long now, Dis. Soon, we will be in our rightful home."

Dis nodded, unsure of what to say. Thorin turned to his nephew, who was awake and watching all of this transpire owlishly. The older dwarf grabbed his nephew's hand and smiled. Before he could say anything to his youngest nephew, his oldest nephew stormed in.

Thorin moved aside and left to join his company, knowing that he was only in the way now that Fili was there.

Fili was crying, and by the looks of it, he had been crying for a while. He climbed up into bed beside his brother and buried his face in Kili's hair. Dis felt herself choking up, and soon enough she had tears streaming down her face.

Fili sat up slightly, brushing Kili's hair away from his face. Dis backed away, wanting to give her boys privacy. She watched as Fili spoke to his brother, wondering if Kili really grasped what was happening. He could answer correctly when asked what was happening, but Dis wasn't sure he understood the finality. Fili kissed Kili's forehead, causing Kili to scrunch up his nose and smile.

The smile faded when Fili stood and turned to face his mother. He quickly embraced his mother, unable to speak with the emotions coursing through his body. Dis whispered encouragements to him, and once again ordered him to return to her in one piece. Fili steeled himself and walked out the door.

When Fili walked away, Kili broke. He screamed and writhed. He must have grasped the finality of it all better than Dis had expected. Fili stopped in his tracks, but Thorin, who had been waiting outside, put a guiding arm around his shoulders and propelled him onwards. As they passed out of Dis' line of sight, she could see Fili's shoulders shaking. He was sobbing.

It was then that Dis cursed her heritage. She cursed the burden of the line of Durin. She cursed all the gold in Erebor and she cursed her brother for choosing destiny over Kili. Dwarves were used to suffering, and Dis as well acquainted with suffering and watching her kin suffer for the sake of righting the wrongs dealt her people.

She held Kili as he grew tired from crying. His cries grew weaker and his movement slowed. The tears did not decrease, however, nor the look of utter heartbreak in his eyes.

Dis shushed her son, wiping his tears. That got Kili started again. He sobbed breathlessly and his face was covered with a combination of tears, saliva, and snot. He began to hiccup and gag.

"Kili. You must calm down. You will make yourself sick. Quiet, my son," Dis warned. But Kili did not stop. Shortly, he started to heave and Dis turned him onto his side as he vomited. "Oh, my baby boy. You must stop," Dis said. She was almost relieved when Kili began to seize. She moved him away from the vomit and watched Kili's body go through the familiar motions of a seizure.

When he stopped, he looked at Dis. Tears were still running down his face, but the post-seizure exhaustion kept him from doing much more than that. Soon enough, he fell asleep. Dis wept silently, keeping watch over her son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry. I honestly cried while I wrote this. I did warm you about the angst, though...


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry about this chapter's wonky timeline. I was getting bogged down and wanted to jump ahead, but felt I should at least have some account of what happened, rather than just jump blindly. This chapter comprises several months, but I promise the pace will return to normal either the next chapter, or the one after that.

After being rescued by Gandalf from Goblin-town, and then being rescued by the Eagles, Fili made a decision. He couldn't stay away from his brother any longer. He begged the Eagle that he was perched upon to turn towards Rivendell, and to his surprise, the Eagle turned immediately. He heard confused yelling from other members of the company, but he did not turn back.

When Fili landed, he said a quick thank you and sprinted down smooth paths towards his brother.

When he reached his brother's bedside, he found his mother asleep next to Kili, in a chair. Kili did not look well. He was pale, and his eyes had terribly dark circles under them. His lips were chapped and his eyebrows were drawn together in discomfort.

Dis woke and gasped. "What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't leave him or you," he answered simply.

"Thorin let you go?" Dis was surprised. Thorin had been quite single-minded as of late.

"Not exactly," he answered. "I sort of just left. I didn't even look back to see if he'd noticed."

"Well, that was very Kili-like of you. I am very glad you are back, though. It has been a rough many days. Kili has not eaten and he seems to have lost all desire to try or improve." Kili stirred upon hearing his name.

"Wakey, wakey, dear brother," Fili said. Kili blinked. He turned his head weakly. Fili expected a smile, maybe even a laugh from his baby brother. Instead, Kili's face crumpled and he began to cry. "Hush. It's alright! I'm so sorry I left you," Fili said, wiping his brother's tears. Kili abruptly went into a seizure.

Dis was crying as she willed Kili's movements to stop. Kili continued to seize, lips blue and eyes wide. After several minutes, the seizure stopped. Kili stared at the ceiling and began to sob.

"What's wrong with him?" Fili asked, alarmed by the state Kili was in.

Dis bit her lip. She did not want to tell him that this had been a constant thing for his little brother since he had left. He never quite calmed down after the first heartbreaking moments. He would cry himself to sleep, wake up, realize Fili was gone, throw a fit, seize, and then stare blankly at nothing.

"He is alright. He has been changed since you left, but will surely come back to himself now," she said. Fili continued to sooth his brother, eventually just crawling into bed and holding him. Kili relaxed instantly, closing his eyes. Eventually, he fell asleep, chest rising and falling slowly.

It was several days before Kili showed any signs of improving again. They were able to get some food into him, but with no effort on his part. He was a shell. When he finally began perking up, Fili was relieved beyond words. He had been struggling with the idea that his actions had permanently damaged his brother's psyche.

He knew his brother was back when Kili reached for his hand and looked into his eyes. Fili noticed that the spark seemed to be back. "Are you hungry?" Fili asked.

Kili shook his head, and then pointed out the window. He hastily added a 'please', and looked expectantly at his brother. Wordlessly, Fili smiled and lifted his brother into his arms. Once they were outside, Fili sat on the soft grass with Kili propped against him. Kili was running his fingers through the blades of grass and breathing deeply.

Fili, Kili, and Dis stayed in Rivendell for several months. They heard second hand of the great battle, and were told that they should make preparations to journey to Erebor. Thankfully, none of the Company had lost their lives fighting either the dragon or during the battle.

The question of how to get Kili safely to Erebor was a troubling one. Elrond had been pondering it for some time now. In the end, they were forced to rely on the help of the Great Eagles once again. Due to the rough terrain and dangers on the road, getting Kili to Erebor would be impossible otherwise.

On the morning of their departure, Dis wrapped Kili in a few blankets and Fili carried him to a wide open space where two of the Great Eagle's were waiting. Kili was alarmingly light in Fili's arms. His once muscular limbs were now weak and quite a bit thinner.

One great eagle carried Kili, who had been put into a deep sleep by Elrond, in his claws to eliminate the possibility of him falling from the sky during a seizure. He would hopefully sleep long enough to get to their destination.

The journey took most of the day, and they only went as far as Laketown. Kili and Dis were to stay with Bard while Fili joined his uncle in restoring and preparing the mountain for their people.

Upon their arrival in Laketown, they met Bard. Dis thought that he had a sour look to him. She assumed it was due to his interactions with her brother, because there was a similar sour tone in Thorin's letters when he wrote of Bard.

"Welcome. You must be Thorin's kin?"

Dis handled the introductions while Fili retrieved his brother's from the Eagles. Kili had woken up just as they were nearing Laketown, and he was incredibly disoriented. The herbs that had put him out for so long addled his mind, and Fili wasn't sure his little brother even understood what was being said.

Kili relaxed when Fili picked him up, though he was agitated. Fili walked towards his mother and Bard, waiting for directions. He shifted Kili in his arms. While he was lighter than before, he was still not light enough to be carried for terribly long.

"Would you like for me to carry him? The walkways of Laketown are unsteady and I will be more sure on my feet," Bard offered. Fili looked unsure, but conceded. Bard carefully took Fili's precious burden.

When they arrived at Bard's modest home, there were three children hovering in the kitchen. The eldest two children at least attempted to look busy, but the youngest simply stared at their strange houseguests. Bard walked to the bed in the corner and set Kili on it gently. The dwarfling shifted, looking out of sorts. Dis sat on the bed next to him, situating her son so he was comfortable. He abruptly started seizing, taking Dis by surprise. She waited for the fit to stop, and then stroked his face, comforting him.

The youngest child of Bard looked very concerned. She walked over to Fili and tugged on his sleeve to get his attention.

"Excuse me, Mister Dwarf. What's wrong with your friend? Why was he shaking like that?" she asked, wide eyed. The eldest daughter blanched and tried to pull her younger sister away, looking apologetically at Fili.

Fili just chuckled. He had been in the same situation many times, scrambling to either prevent or apologize for his younger brother's unintentionally inappropriate words and actions.

"He's actually my brother. His name is Kili, and my name is Fili. What's your name?" Fili asked.

"Tilda. I have a brother too. And a sister, too. Do you have a sister?" Tilda asked.

"I do not have a sister. It's just me and Kili. You are lucky to have a sister and a brother," he answered. "So are you the eldest?" he asked with a twinkle in his eyes.

Tilda giggled. "No! I'm the baby! My sister Sigrid is the eldest. And then Bain. And then me!"

"Oh! I understand now," Fili said, feigning enlightenment. Tilda giggled all the more. Bard swooped in and ushered his three children upstairs to bed, leaving the three dwarves alone.

Kili was livening up, the induced sleep finally wearing off completely. He was listening intently to Dis, who was rambling on about Erebor and the markets of Dale. Bard came back down the stairs.

"Lady Dis, you will take my bed, and I am taking the floor in my children's room," he said.

"That is very kind of you, but I do not wish to impose," Dis replied. Bard insisted that it was no imposition, and after she bid her sons a good night, followed him upstairs.

Fili took his mothers spot next to Kili. "Alright brother. We've got go move you over, because you're stuck sharing a bed with me. And right now, you are taking up the whole bed," he said. Kili grinned and let out a small laugh. He shifted and rolled onto his side. That was as far as he'd ever gotten as far as being mobile was concerned. Unfortunately, he could only roll in one direction, and it was not the direction he needed to go right now.

The blond chuckled and rolled Kili back onto his back before lifting his shoulders and scooting him closer to the wall. Kili looked around suddenly, looking at Fili with confusion. Fili was about to ask him what was wrong when the brunette signed mother a few times.

"She is upstairs in bed. You'll see her in the morning," Fili answered. "You may even see Uncle tomorrow."

Kili's eyes lit up, and he signed uncle several times for good measure. Then, catching Fili by surprise, he signed more and then see. "Well, maybe not tomorrow, but soon you'll get to see Bofur, Balin, Dwalin, and the rest of the Company." Kili smiled before yawning. Fili pulled the thin blanket over Kili before sliding in next to him. Kili rolled towards Fili before he even had a chance to get settled.

Fili smiled as he felt Kili rest his head against Fili's shoulder, sighing deeply. Pretty soon, Kili fell asleep. Fili kissed the top of his head and fell asleep soon after.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized in my efforts to correct the chapter order situation, my lovely comments from my loyal readers were lost. :( anyways, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

The next morning, Fili had to remind Kili several times that he was in Laketown, and that he was safe. Dis had gone to market early to fetch various foods and supplies. She had a fair amount of gold that she had been holding onto since leaving her home in Ered Luin all those months ago. Sigrid had offered to accompany her, and Bard sent Bain along as well.

In the early morning, before Dis had left, Fili had taken the opportunity to bathe. While the tub paled in comparison to the baths in Rivendell, it did the trick. He emerged back into the main house wearing fresh clothes that Bard had provided. They were left-overs from when he had hosted the rest of the company weeks earlier. They were ill-fitting, but clean.

Fili knew that Dis would want Kili to be presentable, should any members of the company drop by. Bard informed her that several times a week, dwarves came into town for supplies.

"May I borrow a comb?" Fili asked, looking over to Bard who was in the kitchen. Before Bard had a chance to answer, Tilda sprung up from where she was sitting by the hearth.

"I'll get it!" she called, running up to her room. She quickly returned and handed Fili the comb.

"Thank you, miss," he said. "Alright, brother, time to tame that hair of yours. Always getting tangled. Nothing has changed since we were dwarflings, eh?" Tilda giggled.

"My hair gets tangled too," she said, plopping herself next to Kili. Kili had squirmed until he was as close to the window as he could get, so that he could stare outside. When Tilda moved around on the bed, Kili wiggled until he was on his back again, curious as to who was moving around.

Bard saw Tilda inserting herself into the brothers' private moment, and redirected her to helping in the kitchen. She scampered off, and Fili took her place on the bed.

He hoisted Kili into his lap. After a few moments of picking at the rats in Kili's hair, Kili had had enough. He pitched himself sideways. Fili thought he was having a seizure, and when he noticed Kili was scrunching up his face in disgust and not seizing, he laughed. "Just like old times! Hold still so I can get these tangles out," Fili said, settling for combing out his brother's hair on the blankets.

When it became clear that his hair was too far gone for just a comb, Fili decided to get his brother into the bath.

"Bard. Is there any way I could use more of your soap? My brother is in dire need of a bath."

"Of course. I will set out extra clothes as well."

Ten minutes later, Kili was up to his chin in warm and soapy water. Getting him in the tub ended up leaving Fili soaked and Kili laughing. He innocently loved when bad things happened to Fili, and Fili always made a show of it whenever he stubbed his toe or bumped his head. Bard had assisted as much as possible, while maintaining a sense of dignity for the young dwarf.

While everyone else was concerned with dignity, Kili didn't seem to notice. Fili was thankful for his brother's restored innocence that the accident had brought about. Where there could have been shame, there was delight. Where there could have been anger and frustration, there was only joy and amusement.

Fili had an arm around his brother's torso against the wall of the tub to hold him upright and above water. WIth his other hand, he bathed his squirming brother. Kili had always had a love-hate relationship with bathtime. While he loved splashing and playing in the water, he despised the actual bathing part. He especially loathed having his hair washed and rinsed.

Now was no different. Fili guided him to dunk the back of his head, but Kili was having none of it. He wiggled around and let out a whine. Fili called for backup. Bard came in quickly, concern etched on his tired face.

"Is everything alright?" he asked, glancing at Kili to ensure he was okay.

"We're fine, I just can't get Kili to cooperate on washing his hair, and I don't have enough hands to force the issue. If you could hold him still, I will wash his hair." Fili grabbed a cup and the soap, and rolled his sleeves higher up his arms. He looked at his brother and laughed. "I promise to make this as quick and painless as possible, little brother. And I won't dunk you like I used to," he said.

Bard rolled up his sleeves and reached over the edge of the tub to hold Kili up, slightly away from the edge of the tub. Fili gently held his brother's head and worked his brother's hair into a lather. Then he and Bard carefully laid his head back and into the water. Fili quickly rinsed the hair and they set him back against the edge of the tub.

Fili took over holding his brother while Bard offered to fetch a towel. While Bard was in the other room, Kili went into a violent seizure, water sloshing against the edge of the tub. Fili held him under his armpit with one arm and held his head still with the other. He was still seizing when Bard came back in.

After a slow minute, Kili stilled, gasping. Dis had also returned and she followed Bard into the washroom. Bard and Fili lifted Kili from the tub and Dis handed them the towel, which was more like a blanket on a dwarf's smaller frame.

Bard scooped Kili into his arms and walked to deposit the boy onto the bed.

Dis took her place beside her son, and Bard went back to the kitchen. Dis dried her son's hair with an extra towel. He squirmed, but was too tired from the last seizure to put up much of a fight as she combed out his dark hair. While she was working out a tangle, she glanced over at Bard.

The man who had slain the dragon. The man who was rightful king of Dale. The man that, minutes prior, had assisted in bathing her son. This man was definitely an enigma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to handle this chapter and the bath-time delicately, and I hope that came across.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! The good news is, I now have several chapters ready to post. I'll try to post a new one each day.

Kili fell asleep while Dis was combing out his hair. She took advantage of that fact and put several intricate braids in his hair.

"He won't be happy about that," Fili said, having walked up to the bed.

"I couldn't help myself. I will take them out if he is upset," she answered, smiling.

They decided to let him sleep a while, bundled up in the towel. She pulled a blanket up to his shoulders. After stroking his head a while longer, she stood and began making herself busy around Bard's modest home.

Fili was sharpening his knives. "Oh, Fili," Dis said, sitting across from him. "I ran into Dori at the market. He said that he would pass word on to Thorin that we have arrived, though I'm sure he already knows. Word travels fast in towns such as these. That being said, we should expect company by evening. I can't say that my pigheaded brother will make his way down, but I'm sure Bofur will stop by."

Fili was about to respond when they heard a thud from the other side of the home. They turned to see that Kili had fallen from the bed, still tangled in the blanket and towel. "Damnit, not again!" Fili said, rushing to his brother.

Much to Fili's surprise and relief, Kili was not wailing as he had done the previous time. Instead, Kili looked slightly stunned. He looked like he couldn't decide if he should cry or laugh. By the time Dis knelt down, Kili was smiling, but his brow was furrowed in seeming discomfort.

Dis ran her thumb over a small scrape on Kili's cheekbone, noting that there was a bit of swelling. It was nothing to be concerned about, however. There were droplets of blood forming, and she was about to ask Fili to fetch a cloth when Sigrid handed her a cloth and small basin. She smiled and went back to what she was doing.

Fili lifted his brother up under the arms and hefted him back onto the bed. "Brother, you really have to stop doing that. Beds are not meant to be fallen out of." Kili looked like he was trying to put together what Fili was saying, but he was still in that half-asleep state.

Dis wiped at Kili's scrape, causing him to frown deeply, eyes watering. His threshold for pain was not nearly as high as it was before the accident.

While Dis comforted her youngest, Fili fetched the clothes that Bard had set out for Kili. They worked together to get Kili into several layers of ill-fitting clothes. Kili was not pleased with all the manhandling, pulling, and fastening.

Once Kili was dressed, Dis filled bowl with porridge from the pot by the fire. She sprinkled it with some sugar she purchased that morning.

Kili was leaning against his brother's chest, and she set the bowl in his lap, handing him the spoon. He ate the entire bowl without complaining or even making a face. Pleased with herself for thinking to buy the sugar, she took the bowl. "Would you like more, my dear?" she asked. Kili shook his head no, but pointed to his mouth. "You want more food?" Kili shook his head. "Water?" Kili nodded.

She filled a cup with fresh water and Kili allowed her to bring it to his lips. He wrapped his hand around the cup, but let his mother lift and maneuver it.

The rest of the day was spent relaxing, with some packing mixed in.

That evening, just as DIs had predicted, Bofur came to call. With him was Oin.

Kili had been sleeping lightly when they arrived. Dis greeted them at the door, and when Kili heard the voices of the visitors, he became quite thrilled. Fili set him up against his chest so he could see who had come to visit.

"Ah, young master Kili. I have missed you!" Bofur said, ruffling the lad's hair. Kili grinned and reached uncoordinatedly for the hat on Bofur's head. It was a bit worse for wear, but Kili was still intent on wearing it. "You've got to say please first!" Bofur said, smiling. Kili hastily signed 'please' and Bofur put the hat on Kili's head.

Bofur moved aside to make room for Oin, who was pushing his way through to Kili. He smiled at Kili, but then fell into his formal physicians' aire. He poked and prodded at Kili, tutting every once in a while. Kili endured the examination for mere moments, before huffing and pulling his arm out of Oin's grasp. Oin was startled, but when he looked into Kili's face, he smiled, placing a gloved hand against Kili's cheek.

A few days before Dis, Kili, and Fili had arrived, Tilda had found a puppy, and she had been keeping it upstairs in the bedroom for a week. The third day that the dwarves were at her house, while she was playing with it, the puppy escaped. Sigrid was sitting with Kili to give Fili and Dis a chance to pick up some last minute things at the market.

She was tidying up the house when she heard a bounding sound coming down the stairs. The dog ran over to the bed Kili was resting on and jumped up. He began to lick Kili's face, making him squirm and smile inspite of himself.

Kili continued to squirm and ended up rolled onto his side. Somehow, and both Sigrid and Tilda are not sure how, he pulled himself up so he was sitting. The dog was in his lap, and he was gently petting it with his right hand and holding it in place with his left arm. He was leaning heavily on his elbows and his head was hanging somewhat limply.

That is what he was doing when Dis and Fili reentered. Dis dropped what she was holding. The clatter caused Fili to fling his head up and look at them.

Fili laughed out loud. "I see you made a new friend while we were gone!" he said, putting down what he had in his arms and running over to his brother. When he approached the bed, the puppy growled, eyeing Fili suspiciously. Kili pet the puppy and it relaxed.

Dis was beyond happy. She couldn't stop smiling. Kili jerked suddenly and fell sideways, convulsing in a heap. The puppy jumped up and began frantically licking Kili's face.

When the seizure abated, Kili squirmed to get comfortable, staying curled up on his side. The puppy snuggled up against him. "Are you comfortable? Do you want to lay on your back?" Dis asked. Kili furrowed his brows and shook his head. His breathing evened out and he fell asleep.

"Well, I'm not sure what to say. Did either of you help him to sit up?" Dis asked. Tilda and Sigrid both shook their heads.

Dis sighed happily. She started to get things packed up, as they would be moving to the royal quarters of Erebor soon. Fili had been up to the mountain and things were progressing in getting things cleaned up and liveable.

"So, are we keeping the dog?" Fili asked quietly.

"I believe the dog belongs to young Tilda," Dis answered. Tilda heard her say that and rushed over.

"No! He seems to really love Kili, and I think Kili loves him too. He should stay with Kili!"

"Does he have a name?" Fili asked.

"Yes," Tilda said, giggling.

"Care to tell us?" Fili pressed her, smiling.

"Fishy." She said, simply.

"That's an interesting name for a dog. How did you come up with that name?" Dis asked, laughing lightly.

"Well, he smelled like fish when I found him. But I gave him a bath so now he smells better!" she explained. She grinned and ran over to her sister, gripping her arm. Dis smiled at the girls. While she loved her boys, she always wondered what it would be like to have daughters.


	17. Chapter 17

Kili continued to make leaps and bounds when Fishy was around. He tired quickly, but spent a good portion of time sitting up on the bed. Several days later, Balin, Dwalin, and Bofur came down from the mountain to check on them and if Kili was up to it, escort them to the mountain. Kili was once again sitting up, hunched over Fishy when they arrived.

Who's the mutt?" Dwalin asked in his usual gruff voice. Balin rolled his eyes.

"That is beside the point, brother. Look at who is holding the mutt! Sitting up all on his own," Balin said, smiling.

Fishy licked Kili's face and he giggled, curling up and burying his face in Fishy's fur. Dwalin was pleased to see the boy so happy, but he wasn't a big fan of mangy dogs. "I'm assuming we are bringing the pup with us?" he asked.

"I think that would be best," Dis said. I don't know who is more attached of the two, Kili or Fishy." While they were talking, Kili went into a seizure, almost falling off the bed. The dog barked, getting Dis' attention. She rushed over to keep Kili on the bed. As Kili's movements slowed, Fishy started to lick the brunette's face, whining. Dis knew that Kili was completely out of the seizure when he smiled and wrinkled his nose.

"By my beard! That was remarkable!" Balin exclaimed. It didn't take long before Kili was breathing deeply, asleep.

Now that Kili was asleep, the group went about planning for the move.

"A litter is our best option, again," Bofur advised. The dwarves all muttered their agreement. The way was still uneven from decades of disuse.

"Kili will not be a fan of that plan," Fili muttered, remembering his last ride on a litter. No one heard him, as they were debating what things were to be brought to the mountain with them, and what they would return for.

Dwalin picked up the bag of sugar. He put it in the pile of things to be left and retrieved later.

"That sugar is to go with us today," Dis said, without looking up. Dwalin swore she had eyes in the back of her head. It would explain how she always knew what trouble her boys, mostly Kili, were causing back in Ered Luin.

"Yes, ma'am," he said, chuckling, putting the sugar in the correct pile.

After putting the family's belongings on a cart, they loaded the still seizure-drowsy Kili onto the litter.

He was not pleased, just as Fili predicted. He wriggled and grunted, shaking his head. "Hush, Kili. Stop your fussing," Dis said, sternly. The other dwarves didn't feel like mentioning the fact that the last time he rode on a litter, they were running for their lives.

Fili did, however, try to calm his brother's uneasiness. "We'll go slow, this time. It'll be a nice, easy ride!" he said. "And Fishy can ride with you."

Kili huffed, but quieted. He patted his stomach and Fishy jumped onto his chest, immediately laying his chin on Kili's shoulder.

After thanking Bard for his hospitality, they set out, Bofur and Fili holding the litter, and Dwalin pulling the cart.

It took the better part of half a day to make it to the mountain. They had to stop frequently for Kili to rest. Although he was being carried, he still needed time to relax.

Dis was lost in her thoughts as they walked through the front gates of Erebor. She was filled with emotions as she looked around the halls of stone. She was snapped out of her reverie by Thorin putting a hand on her arm.

"Welcome home, sister," he said, smiling. Dis embraced her brother. She had not seen him since Rivendell. "Are you ready to enter the royal quarters?"

Dis nodded. Thorin turned to his nephews. They had set Kili down briefly while Dis took in the sights of her home. Balin was holding the dog while they waited. Thorin knelt down and wrapped an arm around Fili. He and Fili had visited many times since they had arrived in Laketown.

Kili was excited when he saw his uncle. He squirmed and tried to sit up. Thorin put a hand on his chest. "Don't strain yourself," he said, somewhat gruffly. Fili rolled his eyes. Thorin seemed uncomfortable. Kili didn't notice Thorin's tone. He only grinned and reached for his uncle. His fingers wrapped around a handful of his uncle's robes and pulled. He was trying to pull himself up so he was sitting. Fili pulled Kili up and propped him up against his chest.

"Kili missed you," Dis said, joining her family. "He asks for you. Kili, are you happy to see uncle?"

Kili nodded and signed "uncle" quickly several times. Then he lunged forward and grabbed Thorin's cloak, laughing. Thorin chuckled. "You are just as eager as ever. You never do anything slowly or carefully, do you?" He ruffled Kili's hair, and then looked at the other dwarves near them. He noticed the dog in Balin's arms and did a double take.

"I see you found a stray," Thorin said, looking back at Kili and his brother. "You two were always taking in strays back in Ered Luin."

Kili grimaced and started to seize in Fili's arms. Thorin pursed his lips and glanced at Dis. Dis was watching her son, but didn't seem concerned. The seizure was a rough one, Kili's lips going blue by the end of it. When it ended, he was gasping for breath and he looked like he was going to cry. "Shh. You're alright, brother," Fili soothed.

Fishy had jumped from Balins hold and began to lick Kili's face. Fili laid Kili down on the litter again, and Fishy took his place on Kili's chest.

They began to make their way again. As they walked through the halls of Erebor, the dwarves inside from Dain's army parted to make way for them. The group was collecting their fair share of stares. No one spoke.

Finally, they made it to the royal quarters, which were still quite bare. Right inside, they set Kili down. He had fallen asleep just before arriving.

When they had set him down, he blinked awake and looked around owlishly. Dis knelt beside him. "We're home. We've arrived in Erebor," she told him. Fishy leapt from Kili's litter and wandered the rooms, smelling intently.

"There's a bed in the next room," Fili said. He hefted Kili up into his arms, with Bofur supporting him as well. The bed was wide and low to the ground. There were furs lining the floor around it in case Kili fell from the bed, which was becoming somewhat of a pattern.

They gently lowered Kili onto the bed. He seemed confused and wary. Fishy jumped onto the bed, pushing his nose through the blankets playfully. Kili rolled onto his side, and curled up into a sitting position, Fishy jumping into his lap and licking his face.

Thorin was watching this from the doorway. He smiled widely at the progress Kili had made. That first night after the accident, Thorin had steeled himself for Kili not surviving to see daylight. When he did survive, Thorin still did not allow himself to trust a hope for Kili to regain any ability to care for himself. Even in Rivendell when Kili was doing so well, Thorin could feel himself putting up a wall between him and his youngest nephew. It was not intentional at first, but he did nothing to break down that barrier. Instead, he spent less and less time with his nephew.

Now, he felt himself changing his perspective. Kili was no longer the result of a terrible accident that he found himself taking on the blame for. Kili was Kili.

Thorin snapped out of his thoughts. "Sister, you must be weary from your travels. You should rest here with Kili. The rest of us will attend to what needs to be dealt with today. Will you be comfortable on the bed?" he asked.

"Yes, and thank you. I would very much appreciate a small rest. Do not hesitate to fetch me should I be needed elsewhere," she answered, laying down on the edge of the bed. Kili flopped back onto his side and rolled over to his mother. It took two rotations and several tries, but Kili managed to reach the other side of the bed. When he was within reach of his mother, he grinned at her and pulled at her hand. Dis understood that he wanted to be snuggled, so she wrapped her arm around her son and allowed him relax into her hold. It didn't take long for him to fall asleep, Dis stroking his hair softly.

All the dwarves save Kili and Dis exited the room and went their separate ways. The entire mountain was buzzing with activity, and each and every dwarf had tasks to be completing.

Dis fell asleep listening to her son's steady breathing. She fell asleep smiling.


	18. Chapter 18

Slowly but surely, the royal quarters of Erebor, as well as the rest of the mountain, became more and more livable. All of the dwarrow were doing their part. They were using their trades to make the mountain their home again.

It became clear within hours that Kili could not be confined to his bed for long. Until then, he had been content to rest and wait patiently for his kin, or anyone for that matter, to come to him. With all of the hustle and bustle, he made it very clear that he wanted to be a part of it.

Now that Fili was forced to spend more time with Thorin working to rebuild Erebor's infrastructure, Dis relied heavily on other Dwarrodam who had just arrived from the Blue Mountains.

Tagra, wife of Gloin and mother of Gimli, was one of the Dwarrodam on whom Dis called first and most often. Dis had often cared for Gimli when he was young, so that Tagra could go to market or clean house. Fili and Kili loved those times.

Dis and Tagra had 'acquired' as many cushions as they could and made Kili something of a nest in the main sitting room of the quarters. It wasn't necessarily stealing when it was the Lady Dis taking items.

Fili had been going in and out of the quarters checking on Kili and moving things about. On one such check-in, Dis had him move Kili to the 'nest'. He did so, and Kili was thrilled. He squirmed and grinned. From his new spot, he could watch as his mother and Tagra bustled about settling things in their rightful could even see through the door, which was kept open into the hall, where there was constant movement.

"Gimli would love to spend some time with Kili. Do you think he would be up for that?" Tagra asked one afternoon. Dis said that she was sure Kili would enjoy the company of someone other than his mother for a change.

Kili was sleeping off a particularly rough seizure in his spot in the sitting room. Fishy lay curled up next to him. They had tried to get Kili to use the furniture, some of which had been made especially for him, but he had made it clear that he would rather be on the pile of blankets and pillows than on the couch. Though he had regained no words, and very little new Igleshmek since the first several days with Dis in Rivendell, he had no trouble expressing himself.

Kili woke an hour later, and Tagra was still sitting with Dis. He rolled himself onto his side, his left arm tucked under his body. Dis sat on the floor beside her son, stroking his head. "Would you like to sit up?" she asked.

Kili looked thoughtful, but shook his head. Shortly, however, he grimaced and went into another seizure. Thankfully it was a short one.

"Another already? Oh my," Dis said, continuing to stroke his head. Kili looked up at Dis and tried to smile, but was too weary from a day of what felt like end-to-end seizures. "When you liven up a bit, Tagra has a question for you." Kili looked towards Tagra, who smiled. He looked like he wanted to engage, but his eyelids were already slipping shut.

Tagra noticed Kili fighting to stay awake. "Sleep, Kili. I will see you when you wake up," she said. Kili glanced back at Dis and then fell back asleep.

"Poor lad," Tagra said. She and Dis sat and chatted for a while longer.

Fili came in noisily, not realizing Kili was asleep. That caused Kili to wake up. "Sorry brother. I didn't mean to wake you," FIli said. "Want to sit up?"

Kili nodded, smiling tiredly at his brother.

Fili pulled Kili up into a sitting position and sat behind him to prop him up. Kili was leaning heavily on his brother, head lolling on his shoulder. Fili noted this. "He seems out of it today. Has it been a rough day?"

"Aye, it has. He's barely had a chance to liven up before another seizure knocks him out. He hasn't eaten anything yet. Keep him up and I'll get something for him." Fili nodded.

Tagra sat on the floor with the boys. When Kili saw her, his eyes got wide, as though just remembering something. He reached for her skirt and gripped the fabric, looking into her eyes.

"You remember I had a question for you, I suppose. I was wondering if you would be up to having a visitor. Gimli was wanting to come visit you. Would you like that?"

Kili didn't indicate an answer right away. Fili pursed his lips. "Do you have a picture of Gimli? Sometimes it takes Kili a while to recognize people. Do you remember Gimli, Kee?" Kili still looked unsure, and Tagra produced a portrait of Gimli from a few years back.

After a moment, Kili's eyes lit up. "Would you like Gimli to come and visit?" Kili nodded. He stuck his tongue out in concentration and sloppily signed "now", eyebrows up in question.

Tagra laughed. "I don't know about that. I will talk with your mother when she gets back. As if on cue, Dis came in with a tray. On the tray was a hunk of soft bread and a bowl of stew.

"Kili, let Fili help you this time. The stew is hot and I do not want you to spill it on yourself," she warned, setting the tray next to her eldest.

When Fili picked up the bowl and held it in front of his brother, who was still leaning heavily on him, Kili shook his head, scrunching up his face.

Dis sighed, knowing full well the cause of Kili's discomfort. She had been trying to no avail to get him to eat a greater variety of foods, such as meat and root vegetables. He had adamently refused to eat anything besides porridge and other items of similar consistencies. The only exception to that was sweets. He would eat any sweet put in front of him.

Fili had a brilliant idea. "Kili. If you eat enough, I think Ma would let Gimli come."

Dis chuckled. They had used that exact line on Kili many times growing up. He had always been a picky eater. Actually, looking back, the texture was the problem 70 years ago, as well.

Nothing during Kili's early development had been easy. From speaking, to walking, or eating, he was always far behind dwarflings his age. The only thing at which he was not late was being born. He came earlier than he should have, and that in conjunction with his picky eating led to his being smaller than his peers as well.

The bribe worked. Kili took the spoon, looking a little annoyed. With Fili holding the bowl steady, Kili spooned up a piece of carrot before slowly bringing it to his mouth.

He proceeded to scoop up the stew, nearly gagging at times, until Dis deemed it was enough. She handed Kili the bread and he took several bites before putting it on the ground.

Tagra had gone to fetch Gimli, who was working nearby, while Kili was eating. When they entered, Gimli was looking a bit shy. He hadn't seen Kili since he left for the journey that Gimli had been deemed too young to go on. Kili looked intently at Gimli before smiling.

"Hi, Kili. I've missed you and your brother. It's been so boring without you two," he said, somewhat awkwardly at first. He was about to sit down next to Kili but didn't have a chance because Kili went into another violent seizure, still being supported by Fili. When he finally stilled, Dis put a hand on Gimli's shoulder in quiet support.

"He is fine. But I do think he is in need of some rest, so I would appreciate it if you and Fili brought him to his bed," she said, smiling at her youngest who looked entirely out of it.

Fili showed Gimli how to lift him, and the two of them assisted Kili to his bed. Kili was upset by his change of scenery and began to whine. Fili told him to rest, and assured him that they would be there later. Kili still looked upset but quieted, and quickly fell asleep.


	19. Chapter 19

After settling Kili into his bed, Gimli and Fili rejoined their mothers in the sitting room. Gimli and Tagra took their leave and Dis brought her knitting into Kili's room. She sat in the chair that Fili had moved into the room for her.

On days when Kili suffered through his more violent seizures, Dis stayed pretty close to her son, just in case something happened. During Kili's last rough spell, Fili dragged a chair into Kili's room when he caught Dis asleep sitting against the wall.

By the time Fili returned with Thorin that evening, Kili had suffered through four more seizures. Two had been relatively mild, but the other two dragged on and on. Dis had left her knitting on the chair and moved to sit on the bed with Kili's head on her lap. She used her fingers to work out the many tangles in her youngest's unruly mane.

Fili quietly looked in on them, not wanting to wake Kili like he had earlier. Dis gestured for him to come over to the bed. "Does he feel warm?" she asked, putting the back of her hand against Kili's forehead. Kili stirred, but did not wake. Fili pursed his lips and mimicked Dis' movements. Kili's forehead did feel too warm. He started to wake up, and shifted uncomfortably.

"Are you feeling okay, Kili?" Dis asked, stroking his face. He turned his face away from her hand and moaned. He arched his back a bit and kicked his legs in obvious discomfort. "Fili, will you fetch water and a cloth?" Fili nodded and left the room. Dis turned back to Kili and brushed his hair back from his face. He was twisting and turning, pulling at the heavy blanket weakly.

Dis pulled back all but one of the blankets. Fili returned with a basin of cool water and a cloth. Thorin followed him into Kili's room. Dis took the cloth and placed it against Kili's cheek. He sighed heavily and leaned into her hand, relishing the relief the cool cloth brought. Thorin had followed Fili into Kili's room when he saw his nephew rushing back in with a basin and cloth.

"Is everything alright?" he asked, concerned. Kili was still writhing in discomfort, stilling only briefly when Dis brought the cool cloth to his face.

"He's developed a fever. Sit with him and I will go and fetch Oin," Dis said, handing Thorin the cloth.

"I will get Oin. You stay with Kili," Thorin argued, knowing that Dis was far more suited to manage a miserable Kili. Or really she was more suited to caring for Kili at all.

Dis simply shook her head and pulled on a cloak. "You are the king. If you go out, you will be pulled in a hundred different directions."

There was no point in arguing with Dis. Thorin sat down on the bed beside Kili. Fili was on Kili's other side, trying to keep him comfortable.

"Oh, Kili," Thorin sighed, bringing the cloth to Kili's face. Kili's eyes fluttered open and settled on his uncle's face. The brunette started to smile, but it was cut short as he went into a violent seizure. When the seizure ended, he looked back at Thorin who smiled down at him. The brief calm moment ended shortly, Kili going back to tossing his head back and forth fretfully and Thorin bathing his pained face with cool water.

All of a sudden, Kili lurched sideways, vomiting onto the blanket and pillow. He also managed to get it all over his shirt. Thorin grimaced, not sure how to proceed. Kili was breathing heavily.

Fili immediately began pulling the soiled bedding away from his brother. The removal of the blankets caused Kili to shiver violently, and the damp mess on his shirt was not helping his case either. "Where are Kili's other shirts?" Thorin asked, looking around. Fili directed him to a chest and Thorin brought a clean shirt over to the bed. "Let's get you cleaned up," Thorin said softly to Kili, brushing his hair away from his damp forehead.

Together, Thorin and Fili got Kili changed into clean nightclothes and onto the floor away from the sick. "I will sit with him in the living room until your mother arrives back," Thorin said, gently picking Kili up into his arms. He left no room for argument from his eldest nephew, but Fili had no intention of arguing. Seeing Thorin care for Kili in a way like this made his heart swell.

When Dis and Oin arrived, Thorin was sitting on the floor in the sitting room holding Kili,wrapped in a blanket, in his lap. He may have been humming softly, but stopped when he heard Dis' footsteps. "How is he?" she asked, kneeling down next to them.

Thorin explained what had happened since she had left while Oin began examining his patient. "Any way we could move the lad back to bed? It's too drafty out here," Oin said.

"He can stay on my bed until his room is cleaned up," Thorin said, lifting Kili again. They walked down the hall to Thorin's bedroom. The room was rich but rather simple. After laying Kili in the middle of the bed, he pulled the sheets up to cover him. Part of him was urging him to leave the room, but he remained.

Oin continued his examination, listening to Kili's chest, pushing on his abdomen, and checking his pulse. After a few minutes, he put his tools away. "Nothing to be worried about. He seems to have caught the stomach ailment that has been making its way around the young and very old residents of Erebor. He'll need plenty of water and broth. Nothing too tough on his stomach. Keep him covered but leave the heavy blankets off. I will have one of my assistants bring by a tonic."

Kili had been fairly disconnected from reality up until this point of the evening. Thorin sent Fili and a reluctant Dis to bed, saying that he was not tired and would stay with Kili for the night.

Once Thorin and Kili were alone, Thorin became introspective. While Kili drifted, neither awake nor asleep, Thorin's mind likewise wandered. He thought of the accident. He thought of the time he had forfeited with his nephew, both before and after the reclaiming of erebor.

He was shaken from his thoughts by a gasp. He looked down to see Kili becoming agitated. He placed a hand against the side of his nephew's warm face, drawing the disoriented Kili's focus towards him. "You're alright, Kili. I know you feel awful, but it will pass," he soothed. Kili finally met his gaze, but his expression as painfully unreadable. Thorin knew that he had not earned one of Kili's bright smiles, but Kili had never denied him a smile and usually a joyful giggle. Thorin was all too aware of the rift between himself and his youngest nephew, but by some miracle, Kili saw no rift. Thorin knew he had gotten away with a series of great transgressions, and that filled him with guilt.

Kili's lack of a smile at this moment of time grew to a disproportionate level of importance. It outweighed all the smiles and acts of childish love he'd received from Kili in the months prior.

Thorin wept. Kili furrowed his brow, before his own eyes filled with tears. He reached for his uncle's sleeve, wrapping his fingers in the fabric. Thorin looked down to see tears rolling down Kili's face, and two big brown eyes looking intently into his own.

The King Under the Mountain sat on the bed beside his nephew, holding his hand waiting for him to fall asleep. He continued to hold his hand long after the young prince drifted off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be honest, I had a hard time ending this chapter. I hope that the catharsis I intended came across. Thorin will be a whole new component of this story from here on out! I just couldn't let him stay an apathetic downer.


	20. Chapter 20

Kili recovered quickly, and within the week he was antsy to leave his room, which he had been moved back to after that first night.

Dis quietly entered his room to check on him one early morning and found him on his stomach wide awake, propped up on his elbows, staring at her. "Well good morning, my son," she said, laughing lightly. Before Kili took ill, he had been propping himself up and holding his head up for longer periods of time.

He grinned and rolled onto his back. Fishy was laying next to his head, and when Kili exposed his face, the dog licked his face mercilessly. He laughed and signed "go" a few times. Kili rarely signed anything just once. Then he signed "up".

"You want to get up?" Kili nodded enthusiastically. "Just wait a moment and I will get Fili to bring you out to the main room," she said, leaving the room. While Dis could lift Kili if she needed to, she took advantage of times when there were other dwarves around to do the heavy lifting.

A moment later Fili came in, smiling. "Good morning, brother!" he said, striding over to the bed. He scooped Kili into his arms fairly easily. "We need to start feeding you more! You are light as a feather," he said jokingly, but he looked meaningfully at Dis who pursed her lips.

Kili had lost a lot of weight since the accident, and this most recent illness did not help his case any. She fed him large amounts of whatever food he would tolerate, but he was still very thin. She had discussed this with Oin, who had an answer that made sense. He'd said that the seizures take so much out of him, it's like doing hard labor in the mines. So whatever he ate got burned off too quickly. While the explanation was logical, it didn't solve the problem.

Fili gently put Kili down in the oversized armchair by the fire, adjusting the cushions so he was comfortable. "Are you cold?" he asked Kili. The brunette nodded, looking at the dying fire. Fili grabbed a blanket and laid it over Kili before stoking the fire. "I'm sorry, Kili, but I have to leave. Uncle Thorin is waiting for me in the council room. I will be back later today, though," Fili said.

Kili nodded, but then furrowed his brow. He pointed to himself and signed "go".

"Sorry, Kee. You can't come with me today." Kili frowned and looked down. "I'm really sorry, brother."

Fili sighed and left. When he caught up with Thorin, he pulled him aside briefly. "How can we get Kili out of the royal quarters? He begged to come with me today, but then I realized we have no way of getting Kili around."

"Talk to Bofur. I'm sure he can come up with something. Maybe a wheeled chair. But I agree. It would be good for Kili to get out of the rooms."

After the council meeting, Fili went straight to Bofur's shop, which he'd set up almost immediately after the battle was won. Many of the dwarves went back to mining, but Bofur was content to continue his craft.

"Well hello, lad! What can I do for you?"

"I've been thinking that we should get Kili out of his chambers every once in a while. But apart from carrying him or using a litter, I don't know how to make that happen," Fili explained.

Bofur nodded, already thinking of designs. They discussed some more, and came up with a wheeled chair, equipped with something to help him stay in the chair when he had a seizure or wiggled too much in attempt to escape.

When Fili returned to the royal quarters later that day, he expected Kili to be sleeping. To his surprise, and short-lived horror, his brother was laying in the middle of the floor on his back.

Before he rushed to Kili's side, Fili was stopped by Dis. "Why is he lying there like that?" he asked, not understanding.

"Well, I am not sure why he chose that spot to stop. He has hardly stopped moving since you left earlier. He scared me half to death at first, when he fell out of the chair. To be fair, it was quite a controlled and deliberate fall, and once he was on the ground, he began perfecting his rolling technique," Dis explained, eyes glimmering with pride. "I guess he has decided that he is not content to be confined."

Fili was thrilled. The most Kili had gotten around on his own was from one side of the bed to the other, and sometimes off the bed. Fili sat down next to Kili, who grinned when he saw him.

"Comfortable down there?" he asked, poking Kili in the sides playfully. Kili squirmed and laughed. "I have to see what's so great about the floor." Fili lay on his own back next to Kili.

Kili squirmed to roll enough to look at his brother. Fili chuckled. "You have quite a nice view of the ceiling from down here," he said. "Pretty soon, you'll be able to get out of here and see the rest of Erebor. There's a lot more to it than these rooms, I assure you."

Fili wasn't sure Kili really understood what he was saying to him, but Kili smiled none the less. Dis was curious as to what Fili had planned, and asked him about it. Fili explained what he and Bofur had come up with. While they were talking, Kili started to seize, colliding with an unsuspecting Fili. He quickly moved to cushion Kili's head, since the stone floor was quite unforgiving.

When the seizure ended, Kili tried to sit up, seeming disoriented. His breathing was hard and fast. "Shhh, brother. I've got you. You're alright, just lie still," Fili comforted. Kili still looked unsure, but stopped his rushed movements. Fili lifted his brother and carried him back to his bed. Before Kili's head touched the pillow, he was asleep.

It only took three days for Bofur to deliver Kili's new chair.

He had taken a chair he had already constructed for another customer. With a few modifications, he deemed it suitable for the young prince. He'd attached two large wheels and two smaller wheels for stability. Bifur had sat in it and Bofur pushed him around to see if it was safe.

In order to ensure Kili wouldn't fall out of the chair, He had built up left side of the chair. He'd considered doing the same on the right side, but deemed it unnecessary.

He brought leather straps and fastenings with him when he delivered the chair so he could put the finishing touches on once Kili was in the chair.

Oin heard about the endeavor and insisted he accompany Bofur on the delivery. They arrived at the royal quarters just after breakfast. Kili was sitting on the floor propped up against the wall eating his breakfast. Dis was standing over him, arms crossed, looking down. WHen she heard the others enter, she looked over. "He won't eat," she said, frustrated.

Kili glared, and then pushed the bowl away. It shattered on the floor, spilling its contents. They all froze, glancing at Dis. Dis just shook her head and closed her eyes. Kili, on the other hand, grinned before laughing. At the sound of Kili's giggle, Dis opened her eyes and looked at her son. His laugh was contagious, and she smiled despite herself.

At hearing the glass break, Fili came out of his room. "What happened?" he asked. He noticed the bowl and oatmeal on the floor and chuckled. "Never mind. Another one?"

"Yes," Dis said, picking up the pieces of glass before anyone hurt themselves.

Bofur bent down and helped her clean up the rest of the mess. "Would wooden bowls be helpful? They wouldn't shatter," he offered. Dis nodded, laughing.

"That would be very helpful, indeed," she answered.

While the breakfast fiasco played out, Oin had knelt down next to Kili. Kili was always wary of Oin when he visited. His visits usually coincided with illness, injury, and usually poking and prodding. When Oin began the poking and prodding, Kili squirmed until he was on his side. He then rolled a few times, effectively getting out of Oin's reach.

Oin rolled his eyes. "Yeah. He's been doing that," Fili said, laughing. "So this is the chair?"

Bofur stood and nodded excitedly. "What do you think?" He pushed the chair over closer to where Oin was pulling at Kili's arm.

Fili was inspecting the craftsmanship. "It looks great! Can we try it out?" he asked. When Bofur nodded, Fili knelt down on Kili's other side. Kili was huffing and scowling as Oin continued his work. "Kee, I'm going to pick you up, okay? We have a surprise for you!"

Fili picked up Kili under the arms and Bofur rushed to get the lad's feet. With Oin standing behind the chair to keep it stable, they set Kili down. After a few tries, Kili was situated.

Kili looked very unsure, and began squirming and sliding out of the chair. "Hold still, Kee," Fili said, hauling him back up. Bofur chuckled, picking up a piece of charcoal he had brought.

"Hold him still and I'm going to mark where we need to attach the straps." Fili nodded, pulling the wiggling Kili back up again. Bofur worked quickly, making marks and squinting his eyes in concentration. "Okay, I think I've got what I need. Fili let go of his brother, though he hadn't really thought it through, because Kili slid out of the chair again, but he ended up falling forwards, landing on the floor.

Fili, Oin, and Bofur all rushed forwards, but Dis got to Kili first. She gently pulled Kili away from the chair and into her arms. Kili had started crying, his hand going up to his forehead where it had hit on the floor.

Dis pulled his hand away. "Shush, you're okay," she comforted. Oin knelt down in front of Kili. He took a bandage and pressed it to the cut on Kili's head. Kili cried out and tried to turn his face away. "Kili, hold still," Dis said firmly, glancing at Oin worriedly.

Oin wiped away the blood, and ran his fingers around the cut. "There's no swelling. He's alright," he said, calming Dis' nerves. She hated when he hit his head, always imagining the worst.

The bleeding had stopped, and Oin poured some alcohol onto a cloth. "Better safe than sorry, lad. Don't want you developing an infection." Dis tightened her hold on her son, knowing that Kili would not like this next bit. Oin pressed the cloth to Kili's forehead, successfully ignoring the airy keening coming from his patient.

Once his forehead was clean, Oin wrapped a bandage around Kili's head. "Just keep it covered until it scabs over," he said.

Bofur and Fili were examining the chair, knowing that Kili was being taken care of. "I think if I attach a foot rest, it will stop him from sliding out of the chair. That in addition to the straps around his chest and hips should be perfect," Bofur said. "I'll just take this back to the shop and make the adjustments. I will bring it back tomorrow."

He wheeled the chair out, eager to continue his work. Oin followed him out.

"Well, that went well," Fili said derisively.

Dis scoffed. "Hey, while I've got him here, will you feed him some more of the oatmeal? There is another bowl in the kitchen."

Fili complied, much to Kili's chagrin. "Don't give me that look, Kee. You're the one who threw the last batch," Fili teased, giving him a few more bites. "Are you thirsty?" Kili nodded. Fili set the bowl down by his brother's feet and got up to get Kili a glass of water. While Fili was gone, Kili looked intently at the bowl. Without warning, he kicked the bowl away with surprising strength and accuracy.

"Kili, that is enough!" Dis scolded, having had enough. She poked him gently in the side to prove her point, causing him to curl up and giggle. "What am I going to do with you?"


End file.
